Adam asked in Social SciencePsychology · 8 years ago

How to restore dignity and confidence that I have never had?

I'm 14. I've been raised as an extremely soft child who'd stay online all the time. I wouldn't go out. Seriously, at all. I'd get bullied all the time. And I'm sick of it now. I want to be confident. I want to fight. I want to feel self-worth (I do) all the time without getting discouraged.

I sadly have to be around people who'd let me down, and I get discouraged just thinking of them. My confidence is limited, I just lift up myself and then bam. I'm not naturally confident. What do I do?

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  • 8 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    You cannot restore what you have never had, you can only acquire what you have never had.

    Your life is, and always will be, exactly what YOU choose to make of it. You don't have to be saddled with your past, unless you choose to be. The ONLY reason people "let you down" is because YOU have expectations of them.

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  • Anonymous
    8 years ago

    There is a book called I Can Make You CONFIDENT by Paul McKenna that may be of help. Check it out on Amazon, or may be available at the library. Also very inexpensive used copies may be purchased. The more confidence is practiced, the more confidence is gained. Good luck to you on you courageous venture of reaching that as an attainable goal. It will serve you well for a lifetime. I have every confidence in you, that you will attain your desired goal.

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  • Anonymous
    8 years ago

    Fake it, till you make it.

    Learning a Martial Art would be very good for you, because you'll learn the discipline, and insight to manage confrontation, both physically, and mentally.

    As a standard, make the decision, to be positive, truthful, and honest, so you look for the good in people, you speak up, for the truth, and you're honest(not judgmental).

    Now, that won't work at once, but you simply need to keep practicing that over, and over.

    Also find 1 trusted adult, or counselor/therapist you can talk to, these problems are a lot bigger in the dark, than if they're out in the open.

    Also, tell your teachers, and don't just ask for help, tell them you NEED their action, or THEY'LL make it worse.

    Basically you emphasize the need for them to be active, and every time things escalate, you repeat this to your teachers, how it's ON THEM to make this situation better.

    Keep your head up though, you can handle this, just build yourself up.

    Source(s): If you're really lost, watch some TV-shows with confident good guys, and style yourself a little after them.
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  • 8 years ago

    Start doing things that build your confidence. Like, start making things, baking, cooking, building, gardening, dancing, painting, whatever makes you feel like you've accomplished something at the end of the day. Then you'll realize that you can do good things, and that you can do great things, and that faith in yourself will build confidence.

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  • 8 years ago

    you really need to motivate yourself by some inspirational quotes like

    Entire water of the sea can't sink a ship unless it gets inside the ship.

    Similarly, negativity of the world can't put you down unless you allow it to get inside you.

    BE POSITIVE

    and never ever give up

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