Hi. Im a 22 year old mother with a 5 year old son. I've been single mom ever since i had my son in 2007. Around January 2012 I decided to look for my sons father for help and to be in my sons life. I found him, he was married (still is) and taking care of two kids that arent even his. I do live with a boyfriend. Not married or anything. Everything was fine untill aound march, me son's father was caught my Immigration and got deported to Mexico, without any chance to talk to an Immigration lawyer due to the fact that he has or has felonies from the past. Again, everything was fine untill he decided to sweet talk me, and ill admit, I went along with it cuz at the time things with my boyfriend werent ok. I would call him because he would call me to tell me to call him back so he can talk to my son, then he would tell him to pass the phone to me and we would talk for an hour or 2. One day, I dont know why he did this, but he turned it around and told his wife that I was calling him telling him I WANTED HIM BACK AND ALL THIS LIES. So it didnt get into anything big because his wife and me hadle it ok. I did say that it was funny that he went and told her what I've been saying but not what he was saying to me too. I called him, he DENIED EVERYTHING making me very aggravated, sad and really angry. Ive always told his wife that the onl thing i had towards their relationship is RESPECT. I awlays did and never had a problem with her untill this hapened. She didint believe me or him but it was still a doubt in her head. Now, wwhile this whle time he has been in mexico, ive been letting his wife take my son with her to visit his dads family. But because i felt betrayed, and stepped on because of what he was doing, I was very upset, and told him to "go **** off with your lies and go explain your family why they cant see their grandson anymore. Untill your *** comes back, we will go to court, thats if you even ****** come back!!!" I knew for a moment i shouldnt of put my son in the middle but i felt betreyed because I was the one who took countless off disses from my family becuase I was looking for him to be in his sons life. I am really angry still and I am defenatly thinking about court if he comes back, but im scared that he would want to take him away from me or he would get him the days he chooses. I would rather like that he visits his child around me, and cant take him, and i sped his birthday and christmas and the holidays with me. I KNOW IT SOUNDS SELFISH BUT IM SO MAD AND HURT. CAN ANYONE ADVISE ME IF HE WILL GET WHA HE WANTS??? OR WHAT CAN HAPPEN???



Well I'm sorry if i put this in the wrong place. My concern is that if he'll be able to come back soon. If he doesn't, I'm fine with that. And because of his felonies and deportation, will he be able to sue me for some reason. That's all., I'm just still mad cuz he wasn't telling his wife the truth when i did.i just feel betrayed. Am i wrong for doing what i did?

Update 2:

He's not my EX HUSBAND. just my sons father. he was never in my sons life until now or mine.

4 Answers

  • 8 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    Let me translate your post, so that the essence of it becomes apparent.

    I am a 22-year old woman.

    I had my child when I was only 17, which means I am the victim of statutory rape. The guy who raped me and should be in jail for his crime, is married. He was married before, and I knew it, but I didn't mind all of this, spread my legs, and got knocked up by a married illegal alien who is also a criminal. His crimes were so severe, felonies, in fact, that he got deported without even having to see a judge.

    But stupid as I was, and still am, despite the fact that I'm an adult now, I still kept in contact with this guy. I didn't give a sh*t about his marriage, or his wife, and I was stupid enough to even let his wife take my son to Mexico. Frankly, to this day I don't even realize how lucky I got that he came back. Had the married, criminal rapist decided to keep my son, I would have been in jail myself now, as that was pure child endangerment.

    But I don't have enough now. Instead of putting my life together, I continue to keep contact, threaten people, and refuse to grow up.

    What shall I do?

    Here is my answer:

    Break of any and all contact to this man and his family. Do not ever contact any of those folks again. If they contact you, tell them that your attorney has informed you that he will press charges for statutory rape against the guy, in absentia. This makes him inadmissible for immigration to the United States for life, if he isn't already inadmissible, which would be my personal guess.

    Next, take care of your son, 'cause he is the only person that matters now. Try to provide for him, and if you ever shag up again with a man, make sure that he's (1) not an illegal alien, (2) not a criminal, (3) has a job, better a career, and (4) loves your son like his own. Such a man is hard to find, given how stupid you have been so far. But don't settle for another loser, ever. Rather, be a responsible mom, for a change, and take your life step by step. Once you have time to breath, go to community college and try to learn something.

    Source(s): The son of a German mother and a Swedish father, I have lived in 6 European countries before immigrating to Southern California two decades ago. I work as a corporate attorney in Santa Barbara and answering questions here is my way of giving back.
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  • 8 years ago

    Well, that's two things you can't do right - either compose a post for answers or do your job! I don't really know what you expect from your rambling rant - but if its sympathy - you've lost me! You EX husband has been deported - only by sneaking back in the USA - would he EVERY be able to make your life any sweeter then it is already. Can he sue you for CHILD support if you have his child - no - Can he sue you to let him see his CHILD - no! Do you have to let his parents see this CHILD - no! I'm sure you still love this lowlife - but what does that make you! A FOOL.

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  • pk
    Lv 7
    8 years ago

    You're in the wrong forum.

    Try singles and dating, or try marriage and divorce.

    This is not an immigration issue.

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  • 8 years ago

    This has nothing to do with immigration.

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