Is this a poem, like prose or something?


Everyone called him ‘Eyeballs”.

They called him that because he didn’t have any.

The rumor was… after a night of heavy drinking he wandered deep into Central Park and passed out. He woke to find pigeons gnawing on his peepers like they were Circus Peanuts.

Oh sure, the hospital fixed him up and cut out all the leftover bits the birds didn’t eat. They also gave him a really nice pair of hand-painted replacements eyes, but a powerful toilet in Muncie, Indiana stole one, and a few months later he lost the other to a ten-year old boy at a Minnesota bus stop in a questionable game of Rock, Paper, Scissors. He had been trying to win the boy’s baloney sandwich, the little prick. So he was walking around with ping pong balls were his eyes should be. I don’t know why they didn’t call him ‘Ping Pong Balls’. Maybe they tried it and discovered it was too long. Maybe it pissed off the Chinese. Either way, I think they made the right call.

I was sitting next to him at a diner just outside of Minneapolis last winter when he pulled out a fresh six pack. No, not a six-pack of beer; A six-pack of ping pong balls. It was well-known he changed them frequently because they tended to get soggy after a few weeks. However, this time I was surprised to see someone had sold him a pack of orange ones.

I watched him pop out the old ones using his coffee spoon, and set them next to his half-eaten bowl of fresh-cut fruit. They rolled menacingly in my direction and came to rest against my water glass like it was magnetic. Apparently unconcerned with runaway sporting equipment, he twisted in a fresh set of orbs and suddenly turned to me, wide-eyed, almost scaring me off of my stool. He extended a felt-tip pen in my direction.

“Would you mind dotting my eyes?”

11 Answers

  • 8 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    Jeepers peepers where'd you get those lines? Picking the leftover pieces out of the eye sockets---now that got me---I don't lose it too often--but I started to feel my cheddar heading for the exit! Another great prosetry.---------------william

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  • dee
    Lv 4
    4 years ago

    Ignoring metrical norms, some individuals write poems in prose. Variety will be elegant, rhetoric as in poems, and while studying the prose poem our mind might be lifted to a plane equal to that of a metrically written poem. It is an art in itself and biographies, novels and essays typically have a poetical kind. The restrict on metres sometimes mars the free float of the poem. Gitanjali is a classic instance for prose poem. Russel's autobiography regularly suggests the beauty of poetry.

  • 8 years ago

    This reminds me of the short short stories published in Isaac Asimov's Science Fiction Magazine. They would have loved this. I only say "would have" because I tend to get antique issues from 25-cent used-magazine and journal depositories, and haven't read any recent issues.

    The novelette is a dead duck, and short stories barely quacking (unless compiled as a collection). But short-shorts have a market.

    Oh, I guess you get the message that I think this is great if I'm suggesting publishing options.

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  • 8 years ago

    hahahahaaaaaaaa THIS is one of the best dang friggen things

    I've read in one hell of a long time! I love it and I love you.

    I love ya for writing it, posting it and sharing it so Thank YOU!

    Thank you so very much because you had me laughing so hard

    when I first saw it last night, I literally left a wet slippery trail behind

    me as I raced to the john trying to contain myself. So thank you for

    turning me into a giant slug. Thank you for getting me off my butt

    and into the shower because I really needed one before I went out

    to sing again. However, I wasn't planning on having to mop the floors.

    So thank you too for the exercise. I thank you from the bottom of

    my mop to the top of Monday morn's garbage heap.

    Funeral services for my pissed off chair will be held this weekend

    as there is no way I can save it anymore. I will be thinking of you

    as I sneak it out this Sunday...

    in the dark...

    in the night...

    um so ya. I'd call it "something" all righty.

    Something special because it's like reading Kurt Vonnegut,

    Steve Martin and Philip K. Dick with a splash of Joe R. Lansdale

    all wrapped up nice and neat in a little yummilicious puddingstone.

    Ooooo you touchin my tra la la

    my ping pong balls

    yeah baby!

    Source(s): That's it! I'm the hell out of here before I get any more bananas! Tata
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  • 8 years ago

    Can`t read it -

    first 4 lines have me feeling sick

    will try again, tomorrow - until then , it`s a `something`

    (swallows, `ulgth`-ish).

    Edit: just read the c/c`s

    and decided to read it having realised it spooked me as I am

    waiting for cataracts op.

    (plus by answering it gets in my Q & A and I can re-marvel

    and go silly on it if I feel low.TY :D)

    *waits for someone to add `Aye, Aye, Sir!`*

    I find it nothing less than marvellous and -sidereal,

    like a `Division Bell` - man, come to life -

    I don`t think I`d be wise to cross my tease with you when you`re in this kinda

    mind-colliding mode - I`m belly-laughing and it - hurts too.

    Hilarity - crescendo -

    then the fine line- you drew it with surgical precision..

    Source(s): I`m trying not to kill my spellcheck - or kill it - can you please write about spellchecker-rage too?
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  • 8 years ago

    I do believe this completely comes under the surrealist genre of poetry. I think it is a great statement about the indifference of the common man to those who have handicaps whether mental or physical. I mean, who put themselves in that characters place when they read this. I did, but then, I am one of the abnormal. I would bet most don't think of it.

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  • doe
    Lv 7
    8 years ago

    You have "crossed the tease" with this one!!! This is poet gone wild, my gosh put your shirt down-lol.

    What were you doing when this brain storm hit - no don't tell me, some things need to stay a mystery! Funny so funny.

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  • 8 years ago

    The Gem just peed herself...

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  • HD
    Lv 7
    8 years ago

    You are too much. Very humorous. Are you the YAP King of Humor? You may be Cheese, you may be.

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  • Kirby
    Lv 7
    8 years ago

    lol that is genius if I ever saw it.

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