Feel bad for taking this medication?

I was diagnosed with essential tremor and it causes my hands to shake constantly (although very mildly). My dad has it too, although he is slightly worse than i am. Growing up, i realised that i had this condition, people used to ask if i was scared or nervous and my father used to try to instill it in me not to be... show more I was diagnosed with essential tremor and it causes my hands to shake constantly (although very mildly). My dad has it too, although he is slightly worse than i am. Growing up, i realised that i had this condition, people used to ask if i was scared or nervous and my father used to try to instill it in me not to be conscious at all about my condition. As ive grown older, ive become more conscious, which makes me feel bad. I decided to go to a doctor about it, and he gave me a beta blocker, to take whenever i needed. Since the tremor is very mild, i don't care about day to day activities, i don't take the beta blocker. However, whenever i have to do big presentations at work, i take it because i don't want clients seeing my shaky hands and assuming im nervous and not confident, my self consciousness actually makes me nervous because i then start thinking what people think about my shaky hands, then it becomes nerves on top of the tremor, which is not good, so i take a pill during those big events. My problem is that i feel bad about taking medication for my condition. Im so dissapointed because i think ive allowed myself to become self conscious and i worry my dad will be disappointed if he found out. I feel taking the medication is cheating and i should be able to cope with my condition. I feel bad, any advice?
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