How to deal with my mom?
I am 23, almost 24 years old. My boyfriend, who is now my fiance, got a job in OK. I made the decision to move to be closer to him. I told my mom this the other night and she is not happy. She said that if I move out there and live with him before we are married, her and I will not have a relationship. I asked her if I don't live with him, then what? And no response. Then I brought up the fact that my brother has lived with two of his exes and asked if she told him the same thing. And, no response. I did not tell my mom that I gave up my job (teacher) already so I can't really go back on my decision, but I do not like the idea of not having a relationship with my mom. We have been through a lot and I feel like I do so much to try and make her happy and still can never win. I feel like she should be happy for me, for us, and yet she is stuck on the fact that I am moving. Even if I get a place of my own and don't live with him, I don't think she is going to be happy. I know it will be hard since I lived at home till I was 23 and even when I moved out, I was only a block away, but really, no relationship? I don't get it and I don't know how to deal with this. Any helpful suggestions would great. Thanks!
- Anonymous9 years ago
Your mom is probably just trying to scare you into staying close to her. I lived with my parents until a few months ago I'm 22. When my daughter and i moved out with my fiance (also my daughters father) my mother pretty much told me the same thing. An I've been with him 4yrs. And we only move less than 20miles away from her. But once we moved out she was still calling to check on us. I told her it wad her lose. That life was too short to live in regret because one day one of us would lose the other soon enough and she came around after some time. I hope your mom does too good luckSource(s): Personal experience
- SueLv 49 years ago
You've made your decision and I don't think you can change how your mom feels about it. In life it is a fact that someone is always going to be disappointed in us no matter what. It is not your job to make her happy either, you're 23 years old and it's time for you to have your own life; your mom is the one that will have to deal with her own feelings. It makes sense for you to move out and have new experiences.