Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 9 years ago

19 my abusive family won't let me move out?

I'm 19 and currently enrolled to be a sophomore at a college around 2 hours away from home. Currently i'm staying home. However I absolutely hate the college that I am at. I have always been an extremely introverted person and I also suffer from depression and I used to use self inflicted pain (cutting) as a way to cope. Most of my problwms stem from my home life. My mother had me when she was 18 and was forced to move out on her own and support herself through college with me. As such sometimes she sees me as the product of her failures. She has called me a plethora of names ranging from whore, *****, heifer, idiot (etc.) She also forces me to reiterate the words she calls me. So if she calls me a retard or a good for nothing piece of crap she makes me agree with her and say it back. However she still pays for my school because it is expected of her in my family. And she does not want to seem like a bad parent. I have two jobs making around 400 a week and a friend that would like me to get an apartment with her to cut costs. I want to leave the university i'm at because from all this emotional abuse my psyche is very fragile and instead stay in town closer to my support system (childhood friends) and attend school to be a cosmetologist, while i'm working. I tried to move out today and my mother refused to let me leace and went as far as to try to hit me (shes tried to fight me before and ended up scratching up my arms really bad) please help me. I want to leave, i need to leave but i'm so scared she'll find me or hurt me or something.


I am scared that she will get physically violent and as she is my mother i'm not sure if i could fight back. Also her husband is a very big man and he has a bad temper and short fuse. I dont want either of them potentially causing me any harm.

5 Answers

  • 9 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    First of all, I'm very sorry that you are going through this. No one deserves to have a parent that blames them for their own choices. I hope you know no matter what she tells you, you're NOT responsible for the choice that SHE made. You're nineteen, so you can move out regardless of what she wants. If you want to leave the university to be closer to your friends, do it because friends are very important... especially in this rough situation. If need be, file a restraining order against her if you feel she may be a threat. I wish you the best... and remember, there is always promise in another day. Pray about it and be strong. :) You'll be okay.

  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    I'm only 13 and I cut too. It makes me feel better. Kids at school call my a lot of bad stuff I go through a lot of depression. But I can tell you... Tell her "mom. Im 19 and need to go out and live on my own. I need to experience the life of an adult. " or somthing like that. And if she lets you go don't tell her where you live. And lock all doors and windows... And get security system. Hope I helped :) God bless

    Source(s): Idk
  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    You're an adult. She's not physically keeping you there. That's in your head. Just walk the **** out of the house when she's not around.

    If you're honestly afraid of her finding and hurting you, just call the police when she comes banging on the door. Problem solved.

    Source(s): Obvious
  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    your technically allowed to leave. leave whenever she isnt at the house. have your stuff secretly packed. then move out. if she comes after you, call the police and put a restraining order on her. just because she is unhappy does not mean you have to be.

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  • 9 years ago

    You are a legal adult. They can't make you stay. You can move. You are your own guardian now, no longer them.

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