Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsWeddings · 9 years ago

Assuming gratuituy is already paid for, is a tip jar at the bar customary?

My fiancee and I are working out the tiny details in finalizing our packaging. We are unsure if a tip jar is custom at the bar considering we have already paid for "tax and gratuity."

Can anyone offer any insight as to whether it is still common to have a tip jar at the bar despite this?

Any advice is greatly appreciated and thanks in advance. Best answer lands the 10!

6 Answers

  • Anonymous
    9 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    I see a lot of bartenders at weddings do this, and I think it is completely tacky and unprofessional.

    The staff is already getting gratuity from whomever is paying for the wedding.

    It is fine if they want to take tips. I always tip at a wedding when they make a good drink or take a big order, but there should not be a tip jar out.

  • Avis B
    Lv 6
    9 years ago

    First of all, make sure that the bartender's service is part of the "gratuity" payment. Many times the bartender is NOT part of the gratuity just the servers.

    If the bartender is NOT covered then YOU, the Bride and Groom, should give him/her a minimum $50 tip via your Best Man as early in the reception as possible. And if there is a tip jar at the bar ask him/her to remove it or have the catering manager ask him/her to remove it.

    Your guests should not see a tip jar. Your guests should not tip anyone, it is the responsibility of the host and hostess to take care of the restroom attendants, the parking valets, the coat check clerks and all those service providers who are not covered in the gratuity fee.

    Answered by: A Certified wedding specialist / A Professional bridal consultant / A Wedding ceremony officiant

  • 9 years ago

    I've seen on bars where the couple had an open bar, and had to pay the gratuity in their contract. The way I see it, if you have a contract, and you pay it they should NOT be allowed to have a tip jar out, and the management of the hall should tell their employees not to accept tips from your guests. I would be mad tipping someone, and then they expect my guests to tip also.

  • 9 years ago

    Per etiquette, there should not be a tip jar at your wedding. The bar is performing a service to you (not your guests) and you are responsible for their tip.

    However, bartenders may consider themselves an independent business at your wedding and may feel they can have a tip jar, it may even be in the contract.

    So, check your contract. Seems you already signed one, but this would always be best to clear up beforehand. If the contract doesn't make it clear, you need to discuss with your vendor.

  • How do you think about the answers? You can sign in to vote the answer.
  • Kelly
    Lv 7
    9 years ago


    I think a tip jar at a formal event is tacky. Your guests shouldn't need to tip a bartender who is being paid already. Their tip is in the fee you have already paid.

    if YOU would like to tip them separately that is fine.

    Does this bartender work for your caterer or venue or is this someone you hired separately?

  • Poodie
    Lv 7
    9 years ago

    There should not be a tip jar anywhere near your wedding where guests can see it. Completely inappropriate.

Still have questions? Get your answers by asking now.