An Anorexia question?
so i’ve been reading things on anorexia, because i dont, or i should say i hardly, eat.
I eat way less then 1,000 calories a day. Somewhere around 500 or less. I know its too little, but i cant eat more. I hate eating what i do.
I weigh myself everyday. I cry because i’m fat, i hardly eat, i drink ALOT of diet green tea so im not hungry, i count calories a lot and always try to eat the thing with the littlest calories. Like i read a post saying that if you do these you’re anorexic. But like, i doubt i am?
I used to eat a lot. I cut down to way smaller meals, soon cut out breakfast, and i dont eat lunch either. The only reason i eat dinner is because my mom makes me and ****. And i want to throw up what i eat, but i cant. Like, i havent thrown up once since i was a baby, and i tried to puke up my food and absolutely no luck.
Im a fat monster. Literally. I started at 180 pounds and am now down to 167. I just weighed myself. I lost a pound. Im so freaking happy, but if i were to gain a pound i would fast and freak and cry and ugh. I dont know what’d i do. It’s just. I honestly hate eating. I’ll be hungry, make food, and then when i look at it, i get disgusted and im not hungry anymore. All my favorite food i used to love, i cant eat. Im down to eating the healthiest low cal diet stuff i can. And when i dont eat, i feel accomplished. Like ugh. I hate this but love it. I want to be stick thin. A concave stomach, but ill never be like that. I’ll never be pretty.
- cazortLv 69 years agoFavorite Answer
It sounds like you are dealing with a lot, so my first advice is for you to hang in there and be strong.
It's really easy to get sucked into unhealthy ways of thinking about food and your body. All around us are messages telling us that thin is beautiful and that fat (even normal, healthy amounts of fat) is ugly. And it doesn't help that there is a legitimate concern with obesity in America because many Americans ARE overweight. So it's easy to cross the fine line of wanting to be healthy and go over into a zone where you're destroying your body.
I want to address several things you said:
(1) you said that your mom makes you eat, and that you don't want to eat much at all. A lot of people get sucked into Anorexia because they feel like they are losing control, and they feel like other people like their family, are trying to take control of their life away from them, by forcing them to eat. So it can be tempting to try to resist what your mom is saying and try to eat as little as possible. I know that one of your highest priorities is to keep control of your own life and keep control of your body. But the thing is--it sounds like you are already losing control because it sounds like you've let an idea--the idea that you need to be stick thin--take your control away from you. You're no longer in control, this idea is already starting to control you, and that's scary.
You can't just stop doing these things if they're patterns of behavior. You need to replace them with healthy patterns. And you need to TAKE CONTROL but you need to take control in a healthy way. Counting calories and weighing yourself every day is not a healthy way to take control--it's an illusion of control, and it is actually going to cause you to lose control over your body and your life. Why? Your weight naturally fluctuates due to water retention, your monthly cycle, and all sorts of other natural factors. Weight is only stable in the long-run. My advice would be to try to use your self-control to NOT weigh yourself. And try to use your self-control to NOT look at calories.
Set some positive goals for yourself. Do you want to be healthy? Do you want to take care of your body? Let me tell you some of the ways to be healthy, in terms of eating:
* Avoid processed foods.
* Eat whole, natural foods.
* Eat a diverse diet, with a little bit of everything in it, including healthy caloric foods (nuts, fish, avocado, whole grains, fruit, etc.) and healthy low-calorie foods (veggies, unsweetened herbal teas, etc).
* Enjoy your food. Eat slowly and eat what you love.
* Learn to cook amazing food from whole, natural ingredients. Use spices and experiment and develop your appreciation for different food cultures.
If you want my detailed advice about what food I think is healthy to eat, you can find it here: http://cazort.net/topic/diet
If you can muster up every ounce of self-control that you have left, and apply it to these things, you will find a transformation in how you think about food.
Also, try to limit yourself from being exposed to negative messages in society. My advice:
* Avoid TV, magazines, and any news media that has images of women's bodies. Just don't look at it. It is corrupting your mind by sending you an unhealthy message.
* Stop looking obsessively in the mirror. Try to exercise your self control to not look in the mirror. Focus on enjoying life and stop thinking about how you look.
* Ask people you know what they think looks pretty or attractive or healthy. Ask guys, ask girls, ask people your age, ask older people, ask kids. Pay attention to the different things people say. Listen to them. You need to start forming your own opinions about what is healthy instead of just taking a message from society. Make it a project to get as many opinions as possible and start forming your own beliefs about what is beautiful.
I know this sounds like a major undertaking but I really think you can do it. Anorexia is just a label, but it sounds like some of the ideas you've expressed are getting into that dangerous slippery slope that can lead to unhealthy ways of thinking, eating, and living. You can get into a more healthy state but you need to understand what's going on in your mind and body and you need to make the decision to take charge.
- LaurelLv 69 years ago
It sounds like you would be diagnosed with EDNOS, or eating disorder not otherwise specified. It can be just as serious as anorexia and have just as many complications for your mental and physical health. Please get help. Talk to your mom, your doctor or a counselor and ask for a recommendation to see a therapist and dietician who specialize in eating disorders.
- 9 years ago
well i think if you think you are/ were overweight for your age and height than you should always go the healthy way - exercise and eating healthy things, make sure if your hardly going to eat than is something that gives you alot of nutrients because they are extremely important. and yes from my perspective of your story you do have anorexia but you shouldnt have to feel that being stick thin is 'pretty'! i dont know how old you are but i know that you WILL find someone who will love you for YOU not your body shape! You are beautiful, but you shouldnt feel as if you must drastically change yourself to feel beautiful, anyway almost every man prefers curvy than stick thin! you should be looking for a healthy role model like the ones in fitness magazines (not the extreme body builders though) they are extremely healthy!
- Anonymous4 years ago
"anorexia blues" by utilising narrow jim mcgraw "bleeding blues" by utilising hank "wristy" slitwrists "i'm too damn fat" by utilising jemima hazelwaters "god damn those chips" by utilising ricky martin "shrink myself to tutor you incorrect" by utilising harold p. jellington