Abusive husband but says he loves me. 5 months of marriage. What to do. I am confused.?

I am married for 5 months now. My husband treats me badly. He abuses me, calling me names, tells me that i am good for nothing. He tells me that i am useless thereby lowering down my self esteem. Every time i try to do anything new, i am criticized by him. Every time its like him only who has to decide on things. I... show more I am married for 5 months now. My husband treats me badly. He abuses me, calling me names, tells me that i am good for nothing. He tells me that i am useless thereby lowering down my self esteem. Every time i try to do anything new, i am criticized by him. Every time its like him only who has to decide on things. I am nowhere existing for him. Initially when he started taking control on me, i never confronted thinking that this is just for the first time or may be he wil not repeat it. but i was wrong, the more i resisted the more i suffered. When i tell him that i didnt felt good about what u said to me or the way u insulted me, he points it back to me and blames me for his anger. I mean, whatever he is saying or doing, it is all because of me.. I just dont know what to do in this case. This happens like every month, a big fight happens and small small issues would always be there every week. When things are calm, he comes to me as if nothing happened and he loves me alot (which he says that he loves me but i dont). After all this, i am getting hopeless, i have lost my confidence. I am happy that i dont have a kid as of now else things would have been worse than this. But i need to understand what all is happeneing around. He abuse me, insult me, call me names, says that i stink, and i dont love him etc. but still says he loves me.. I am totally confused. I think about this all day and night. When he tries to get sexually active, i get irritated because all that has happened to me. I cant forget what all he has said to me or done to me. And now the situation is so worse from my end that a small issue which is avoidable, hurts me badly and i feel helpless. There are very less times when i feel good and as soon as he start saying things to me, i feel like i should die or i should run away from this place, but never had the courage.. My parents are supportive but still i dont know what to do. I know i am not well and i need a supportive husband who can help me to get better but if i stay with him, my situation would get worse. I am in an indian family and i really dont know where to start from or what to do.. I am so confused. Sometimes i feel i should stay n this relationship and wait till he changes.. But i dont know.. I need help and advise badly.... Pls pls help... I live with my in laws and they also dont support me as my husband and me are earning member of the family, so they are kind of neutral + deviated towards my husband... They are from village and have orthodox thinking...
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