麻煩修改英文自傳

I grew up in a nuclear family, containing five members. Parent’s arewell-being and optimistic. My father,works day and night is a worker. My mother who works hard in my family and isin charge of chores. My younger brotherhe work in factory, either my younger sister. I am the eldest in the family I am independent alwayshave own ideas. Since childhood, myparent’s education the democratic way of communication. Therefore I am independence, initiative andresponsible attitude to life. My familyalso harmonious and state of the economy to maintain self-sufficiency. Iwas born in Chunghua, but I studied high school in Taichung . After I am graduate fromhigh school, and admitted to WenzaoUrsuline College of Languages. However, I use some after-school time to find apart-time job, it give more perfect than the book of practicalexperience. I am also very grateful to those tolerant of mypeople. AlthoughI had not contact with the different areas of work, Ilike to contact and services the guests. Maybe I can not to be equal, if give me some time and opportunity,I can do the better. I know itis hard have the opportunity to work, I will treasure this opportunity. I willupgrade to my ability then thank you for giving me theopportunity. Finally, thank you fortaking the time to review the my resume, and lookforward to grow together with your company, and I am willingto accept your training.

中文原文對照

家中成員五員,父母安康樂觀,父親與母親都從事於工業;有一位弟弟,當完兵後目前在工廠上班;另有一位妹妹,也在工作之餘貼補家用,家中排行老大的我從小獨立自主比較有自己想法。自幼父母則以民主溝通之方式教育我,因此造就我獨立自主、積極主動、負責之生活態度,家庭關係和諧,而經濟狀況亦能維持自足。 出生於彰化市的我,從小學到中學,都是在住家附近就讀,沒想過外面的世界,但是上了高職,到台中市就讀,通車上下課,接觸的人多了,看的也多了,想法就不同了;高職畢業後打算繼續升學,而考上文藻外語學院,然而也會利用一些課餘後的時間打打零工,我想這些實際經驗遠比書中能給得更完善。而我也很感謝那些包容我的人。 雖然不曾接觸過不同領域的職務,但我喜歡接觸客人服務客人,或許我一開始不能夠勝任,但是我想給我一些時間及機會,我可以做的不錯。我曉得有工作的機會是很難得需要好好的珍惜,而我也會讓自己的能力提升來感謝您給我的機會的。最後,謝謝貴公司撥空審閱個人履歷,期盼能與貴公司一同成長,並願意接受貴公司培訓。

Update:

麻煩各位大大,幫我修改文法和不足之處修改或增加。

用途於找工作,感謝各位。

2 Answers

Rating
  • 9 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    大大您好

    以下是我的翻譯

    供您做參考

    There are five members in my family. My parents are optimistic minded and work in (what kind of) industries. My brother is working in an (what kind of) industry after finished his military service. My sister assists family living while working. I , the oldest son among others, have my own thought and am independent. My parents communicated with me democratically since I was a child, making me independent, proactive, and responsible toward my own live. My family relationship is harmonious and family economic status is self-efficient.

    I born in Chunghua. Schools I attended were always around my home, resulting in the fact that I had no chance to sufficiently broaden my eye-sight. It was not until when I was a senior high vocational school student in Taichung. In particular, during that period, I got more chances to communicate and interact with different people, leading me to have my thought diversified. After graduated, I was accepted to study in WenzaoUrsuline College of Languages. I used some of free time working for a part time job. I think my practical experiences could help me improve those I didn't learn academically. Additionally, I appreciate those who are considerable when I worked.

    Although I nenver enter other (what kind of) fields, I like to interacte and serve customers. Perhaps I may not be able to do this perfectly at first. Nenvertheless, I believe I can make it better if time and opportunity that I have are sufficiently enough. I certainly know that it is not so easy for people to have opportunity to work at this moment and will obviously take it seriously. I will also improve my ability as an appreciation (reward?) for your kind opportunity. Lastly, I would like to express my gratitude appreciation for your time to view my resume and accept any possible training to become your qualified and contributive employee.

    我有稍稍修改內容

    希望對您(求該職)真正有幫助

    祝福您啦~~~~

    2012-05-03 20:44:56 補充:

    抱歉

    不是(reward?)

    (feedback?)

    2012-05-04 07:48:53 補充:

    sorry

    不是

    self-efficient

    self-sufficient

    Source(s): 小小留學生 附註請引用, 小小留學生 附註請引用
  • 9 years ago

    1. 1. My father,works day and night is a worker. My mother who works hard in my family and isin charge of chores. Ø My father works hard, so does my mother, being charging of chores, in my family. 2. My younger brother he work in factory, either my younger sister. Ø My younger brother works in a factory, so does my younger sister. 3. I am the eldest in the family I am independent alwayshave own ideas. Ø I am the oldest child, and I’m an independent person with critical thinking. 4. Since childhood, myparent’s education the democratic way of communication. Therefore I am independence, initiative and responsible attitude to life. Ø Since I was a child, my parents have educated me democratically. That’s the reason why I am now so responsible and initiative. After I am graduate fromhigh school, and admitted to WenzaoUrsuline College of Languages. However, I use some after-school time to find apart-time job, it give more perfect than the book of practicalexperience. I am also very grateful to those tolerant of my people.Ø After I graduated from high schol, I was admitted to WenzaoUrsuline College of Languages. Moreover, I have taken full use of after-school time to do my part-time job. Also, from it, I appreciate the person being helpful and patient. 1. 恕我直言,你應該不是主修英文的吧? 假使是,下面是給你當頭棒喝2. 假使你不是主修英語,你這樣算蠻好了。3. 太多錯誤,語病和中式英文,我不想改了4. 雖然我根本也沒多強,但是我覺得很可怕5. 難怪有人說… 科大只能讀國立,要讀私立只能待普大6. 對不起,我說話很賤,但是… 文藻人的英文真的就如此???????????7. 你履歷自傳完全沒有切中要點! 好好去請教老師吧!

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