Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Social ScienceGender Studies · 8 years ago

'Chivalrous' deeds make little to NO sense to me. They really don't.?

ONLY because they seem pointless and stupid, when you REALLY think about it. Why in the world should men be expected to hold doors open for women or pull out their chairs for them or give up a seat for them on the bus and/or subway?

Last time I checked, while generally, women don't exactly have the same upper body stength as men, they're all HARDLY decrepid or frail. Their bones are made of twigs, their fingers and wrists won't snap in half if they have to open a door. Pulling out a chair for yourself is hardly a huge chore. And so what if a woman has to stand the whole time she's on a bus or a subway? What if the guy in the question who is EXPECTED to give up his seat has a bad back? Or arthretis? Or wakes up at 4 AM and works until 9PM at a hard working job, on his feet ALL DAY, and wants to sit and down and rest after a hard days work? Why should he be expected to give up his seat to the bimbo who probably just got back from the spa where she was pampered, spoiled. and relaxed all day long?

If it were an elderly woman in these situations, I'd gladly open a door for her or pull out her chair or give up my seat on the bus, and if it were a woman who looked like she was tired or was having a bad day, sure I'd do those things for her too. But I'd also do it for an elderly man or a guy in general who looked tired or was having a bad day. I don't see what 'chivalry' should be exclusive to just women, that's like saying that women are special and should be treated as 'Queens' and men are just 'chopped liver'.

Update:

@angelluv,

Okay, but would a woman extend that same courtesy to a man? Why do women get special treatment? And why should holding doors, or pulling out a chair, or giving up a seat on a bus be only extended to women? Chivalry is sexist to both men and women because it implies that women are not capable of doing these things for themselves and that men aren't worth such courtesy.

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  • 8 years ago
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    please, don't assume women are all a "bimbo who probably just got back from the spa where she was pampered, spoiled. and relaxed all day long." the spoiled are in both genders (believe it or not) but so are the hard working...

    I believe in equality between men and women, that you should hold the door or give up your seat or anyone, just a gesture of kindness. I've held a door for a guy before, and it pleasantly surprises some of them. I've had doors held or me too, and i always make sure to thank the kind man. It never goes unappreciated to me.

    the key about men and women is that men want to feel respected, and women want to feel loved (not saying the other gender doesn't want these things, but these desires tend to be the most prevalent) Women enjoy it when a man goes out of his way to do something chivalrous, it makes them feel loved. It's not that they can't do these things alone, or that they are too delicate, they just like to feel special. Some men want to make their girl happy. Some men use it was brownie points for fulfilling their sex drive.

    To me it appears as you don't feel respected as a male, since to you it seems exclusive of your gender, so therefore you feel as if chivalry is pointless. I hope you realize that there are women who respect you, and that you don't give up of chivalry. Hold a door for both men and women, and make someones day with just a simple gesture.

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  • Indie
    Lv 6
    8 years ago

    i hold doors open for anyone, i don't feel exploited for being polite. if i have a priority seat on a bus i will always give it up to someone who appears less able to stand or move further back. also i hate it when anyone tries to move my chair when im sitting down, too many childhood pranks where the chair was completely removed and one case of ending up in hospital. no touchy my chair!

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  • Anonymous
    8 years ago

    Chivalry is code for "male servitude to women"

    That's what this society is about. Enslaving men to the needs and wants of women. There's a reason many men try their best to give women everything they want. Little do they know that they will end up disappointed. They will still be unappreciated by women.

    Many women are never content with anything and many men are very naive when it comes to that fact.

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  • Anonymous
    8 years ago

    i give courtesy to everyone and anyone that needs it. i don't expect doors open for me, i hold the door open whilst the person behind me comes in, give up my seat for anyone who looks like they should be sitting down. i am healthy and don't need things done for me but i show courtesy to those people who do need things done for them.

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  • 8 years ago

    The point of it is to show us that you're a gentleman.

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