Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Society & CultureEtiquette · 9 years ago

people who are ALWAYS late?

my boyfriend lives about 22 miles away and with traffic, it takes him about an hour to get to my house. if he says he'll be here at 6:45, he'll be at least an hour later. its like he leaves the his house at 6:45! he always keeps me waiting, so i go do other stuff, since i will not just sit on my butt for an hour waiting for his tardyass to get here. when he shows up, i'm in the middle of doing something now and he gets angry at me for being late and says next time he won't come so early since i am not ready! am i wrong to have been doing something else? he is just always late, no matter what and i noticed he picked up this habit from his family who are also chronically late. what do i do? i have approached him with this problem so many times, but he just seems to not fix it. he's always making up excuses why he's late. ex = car broke down, bad traffic, had to run errands, blah, blah, blah. we see each other every weekend and every week, it is these same excuses so i know they are not true.

Update:

Lol , you are OBVIOUSLY a dumb ***** that is always late . You don't even know me so don't assume **** , kay .

8 Answers

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  • 9 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    You might as well roll with the punches here. If you say 6:45, and he won't show up until nearly 8:00, you could say 5:45 and hope he leaves in time to get there before 7:00.

    Or you can get all ready, and then do something interruptible while you wait, such as dusting, straightening out a drawer or closet, or even reading something you've been meaning to get to. Then you'll be able to sail out the door as soon as he arrives.

    My mother once told me about a wealthy, elderly couple who lived in a Caribbean country. When they were scheduled to go somewhere for an evening event, the husband would change into his dress clothes, and then sit in the front hall while his wife got ready. He had a comfortable chair, a table, and a reading lamp there. Over the years, he read through most of the classics of world literature while waiting for her.

    I wonder, does your boyfriend usually arrive late for his job? Most employers won't stand for that for very long. Perhaps this guy does not have a particularly bright future.

  • 9 years ago

    Then ask him to come at 5:45 when 6:45 actually works.

    Just keeping expecting him to be late. If it really bothers you, have a sit down with him. BUT since it runs in his family, there may be nothing you can do. Unless HE really wants to change that habit, he won't change. You can't change a guy like that.

  • Penela
    Lv 7
    9 years ago

    Maybe he's just not that into you any more. It would help a lot if you would get off your bum and go and visit him from time to time. No sane person would look forward to fighting traffic just to see a girlfriend who is too busy and ends up fighting with. Is that fun? No, it's not. If I was him, I'd tell you to go away.

    Instead of giving him a hard time about being late, why don't you give him an incentive to be on time? For instance, if you arrive here at 6.45 there is a nice piece of cake waiting for you (or something to that effect). Positive reinforcement might work here.

  • 9 years ago

    He is probably not doing anything wrong behind your back since his whole family is chronically late. Maybe tell him to be an hour early (5:45) so he can get there on time.

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  • Tell him you are tired of waiting and don't have time for it. Next time you tell him to be there at 6"45, and he isn't, text him and say if you arent her in the next 10 minutes I'm eating dinner by myself. Or don't text him and just continue on your plans as if he were there, like eat and then watch your movie, or whatever. Good luck.

  • 4 years ago

    i attempt to be on time or early for each thing. artwork is somewhat diverse. I actual have flex time the place I artwork. i will are available each time throughout a 2 hour window. yet what time I are available determines as quickly as I leave. i'm pleased with that. If i comprehend i pass to be greater suitable than a pair minutes previous due for something, or think of i visit be previous due, i will call forward.

  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    Why don't you get off your lazy azz and visit him? if his "lateness" is such a problem then you need to start driving to his house so that way you know you will be there on time. Seems as if the people complaining about others being late are always the people who are "waiting around" for others to come rescue them out of their misery. go visit him, be proactive and stop sitting around whining about something or someone he won't change. Breaking up with him over this is just silly.. shows how much you really value your relationship with him. Your relationship won't last anyways so your saving him his gas money and his time.

  • 9 years ago

    I agree with those who said you should just plan for when you know he'll arrive rather than when you want him to arrive. If this is not going to change, break up with him or adapt.

    Source(s): I have a good friend who always shows up an hour EARLY, comes over by surprise, or texts me the moment he arrives at my house. He is Chilean, it's a cultural thing, and he will never change. I have just learned to predict when he'll be here and be ready. Alternately, he always shows up 3 hours late when we plan to get together for dinner, so I've learned to plan a snack instead and not turn on the coffee until he actually arrives. Pick your battles and save a relationship.
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