Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 9 years ago

How Can I Get Over This?

Okay, so I had a few "pen-pals" on the computer I'd email. I never gave out any personal info, nobody said anything creepy, we'd mainly just talk about video games and cartoons. I asked my parents before I started to talk to them of course, and they said it was okay for me to do so. However, a few months later, they got REALLY mad and banned me from messaging ANYONE on the internet (even family!!!)

Before you go on thinking, "She must have been talking to a creep after all" or, "What did you DO kid?!" I didn't do anything. The conversations didn't change, and it still remained on a friendly level (nothing creepy). One thing I can tell you though, and not to put the blame on anybody else, my sister just ran off with a foreigner and I think that scared them (me too.)

However, a few weeks later, I started talking to one of my pen pals again after my parents strictly forbid me from doing. It was two days, and I said enough. But I was the one who started talking again, and now I feel awful. I have a really bad case of a guilty conscience and I feel like I made things harder on my parents (even though they don't know.) It's just... I'm a goody-two-shoes, and, like I said, I feel AWFUL!!!

How can I get past this? I know compared to all you problems out there this isn't that bad. But I've seen my dad cry for the first time in my LIFE over my sister and I don't want to see him shed even one tear over me. It makes me feel sick every time I think about it. I don't want to tell them because it'll upset them very much. But that's the thing, I upset them without them knowing and it hurts. I'm contributing to all the unfortunate events that are happening to my family (not just my sister leaving us) and I just feel so nasty. Please tell me what you think of this situation and what I should do. I really don't want to tell them because it will only make things worse. They don't know and don't have to. I just need someone to tell me it's okay I guess... I'm such a baby.

3 Answers

  • Anonymous
    9 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    honestly as unlogical as it seems it would be best just to come clean about it

  • 9 years ago

    Wow! I feel priviledged to be able to help you out on this one because I've had such a similar situation happen to me!! I wont go into details unless you'd like, but, you probably did not do anything wrong. The fact that they banned you from even talking to family proves that they are just scared and going to the extreme to make sure you don't do what your sister did. I will tell you the BEST thing that worked for me was just to sit down and talk to them. Im not sure if that is an easy thing to do in your house, and it was even hard for me. But just tell them you would like to talk to them about some things that are hurting you. Talk about what happened with your sister.. but, you dont' have to tell them that you've been back in contact with your Pen Pals. They could read into that and think that your Pen Pal is soo important that you would go behind their back to talk to him/her and that something MUST be going on. My parents always overanalyze things so Im just trying to look at it from every perspective. You will get past this! :) And about you feeling so bad.. if it makes you feel bad, don't do it! Easier said that done, but, having someone tell you its "ok" won't always make you feel better because you know deep down that its not. They may be wrong and being over protective, but they love you and are just scared.

  • 9 years ago

    You should tell them, even if you feel really bad about it. But, you should also tell them that you're not going to run off with a foreigner or something like that. That's like saying that your dad can't talk to any other woman besides your mom, otherwise he'll run off with them. If they really don't want to let you, there's nothing you can do about it, but at least get them to allow you to explain the situation to your friends and that you can't speak to them anymore.

    Good luck

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