teeg asked in Pregnancy & ParentingAdoption · 8 years ago

How likely is it that a black baby would be adopted..?

I was raped by a black man and if I get pregnant I would want to give the baby up for adoption, as I can't bring myself to have an abortion but my family would never accept a black child. I've dealt with social exclusion all my life and I don't want to keep being stared at and ostracised in public for having a black child. Also since my boyfriend is white, everyone would know I was raped, or they'd think I'd cheated. So, adoption is my only option, don't judge me.

So, are most black babies adopted? Or would he/she grow up in foster care?

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  • Anonymous
    8 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    Dear one

    I do not even know where to begin ... the pain you must be going through after being raped is far more then anything then I can imagine

    So, before I write anything concerning your question, allow me to send you all my love and compassion in this difficult time, ask you to be patient with the healing process and hold fast to the hope that the healing will come

    In time like this surround yourself with loving, caring and gentile people to help you regain sense of trust, strength and self-love you might have lost because of the rape

    I love children, seriously love children, but for you, I hope that you did not get pregnant cause that would make the whole situation more difficult and painful

    But in case you did, I wish to ask you to be strong in your decision not to have an abortion

    I`m sure you are unwilling to do it because you see it as taking away an innocent life (which it is), so stick to your decision and avoid abortion - not just for the baby`s sake, but for yours as well

    You do not need that burden of guilt on your shoulders - trust me on that one!

    As for adoption - I do not know the statistics, but I figure that as there are loving people willing to adopt white children, so there are loving people willing to adopt black children

    I am white and honestly would not have any trouble adopting a black baby - on the contrary, I would enjoy every minute with him/her and be proud of him/her

    So, if you wish to give him/her up for an adoption, I think there is a good chance that the baby will be adopted ... then again, there is a chance that it will grow up in a foster care - the odds are there

    If you want to be sure that the baby gets in the best possible hands and that it is safe - then, dear one, the only option you have is to keep the baby

    That was a difficult suggestion, I know ... considering the whole situation it seems rather insensitive and ungracious of me to give it ... I was even reluctant to write it ... but, it snuck its way out of my heart into the keyboards :-)

    Yes, I must admit of having hope that, in spite of the circumstances, you will not give the baby away

    Why do I have such a hope? Well, two reasons:

    1. I think that, in most cases, baby belongs with its mother

    2. that you are among those “most cases” :-)

    The tone of your words gave me the impression that somewhere in side of you lies a secret desire to do what is best for the child even if it means keeping it with you and struggling with the problems you mentioned

    If this is true and I did not misinterpret, then you have it in you to be a beautiful mom and to seek the good of the child over your own good

    Rarely do the women that get pregnant because of a rape keep the child ... but those that do show us most clearly who strong the heart of a woman can be and that love can conquer any evil

    Hope this helps a bit

    Send you all my love and a warm hug

    Sincerely

    Maria

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  • 8 years ago

    I would love to adopt your baby. My husband and I are white but my parents adopted many children who are not white when I was a child. We have a diverse family and if you wanted your child to have a loving home, we could provide it. You can email me at ithi_ithi_akai@yahoo.com I have been wanting to adopt for years now. Please let us know because I want to be a mother very much.

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  • Anonymous
    8 years ago

    Most of the time it depends on the area as to if a black baby would be adopted. HOWEVER there are sooo many people who would love a baby no matter what color. We are all Gods children. Someone will adopt your baby

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  • 8 years ago

    Of course ebon babies are adopted, if not in the US, they can always be shipped to Europe or Canada. I just hope you are not pregnant.

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  • 8 years ago

    Healthy newborns are almost always adopted right away no matter what color they are. There aren't as many couples open to black or biracial babies as white ones, but there are some. My husband & I are white & we adopted our black daughter as a newborn. I've never felt like I was stared at or "ostracized in public." If anything, it's broadened our worlds & we have new friends that we wouldn't have otherwise, & anyone that is rude or judgmental isn't worth your time. However in your situation I completely understand why you're choosing adoption. Look up agencies in your yellow pages & call a few to find the right one for you. They'll have profiles of couples who want to adopt, & probably some of them would love a biracial child.

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  • 8 years ago

    Before I answer your question, I am very, very sorry for what you have and are going through. I was raped as a teenager, and I conceived as a result of that rape. I know the chances are "rare", but it does happen. I knew I could not raise her, and I had to debate whether to have an abortion or choose adoption. I gave both serious thought. I decided that it wasn't my baby's fault... I couldn't see myself "killing" my baby and knew I would forever regret it - I wanted her to have a chance at life.

    Anyway, any mostly-healthy baby has a very, very good chance at being adopted. There are sooo many adoptive parents out there waiting for their chance to adopt. Some do want white babies only, some want black babies only, some prefer bi-racial or some other preference, and some really don't care.

    If you go to IAC, you can search parents who are open to the type of child you will be having if this is a concern for you. You can also choose the type of family you are seeking. You can also call their adoption counselors 24/7 at 1 (800) 877-OPEN (6736).

    Generally, if you choose adoption for an infant, he or she will NOT be placed in foster care.

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  • 8 years ago

    I have a a small circle of friends with adopted children and out of that three of the children are half black,three are are Hispanic and the the remaining 8-9 are white. I know a family who has one mixed race child and is hoping to adopt another. People adopt all types of children.

    All the best.

    Source(s): ap x2
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  • 8 years ago

    as someone who is placing her baby, I know for a fact that there are black couples looking to adopt. Don't listen to these other people, they're clearly immature and wrong. When I was selecting a couple to place my baby with there were several black couples RIGHT HERE IN THE US that are looking for a child to adopt. Also- its very mature of you to consider giving the child life, even though the way it was created is traumatizing. Contact Catholic Charities. they don't charge anything for a private adoption, and they help you get a doctor and everything. Best of luck!

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  • 8 years ago

    Call an adoption agency as soon as you know and pick out the parents before the baby is even born. You don't have to meet them, or you can meet them an have an open adoption. You could see the baby, or just get pictures, or close this chapter of your life and move on. Or give that baby to social services, and the baby will most likely be grabbed right up. My friend has been trying to adopt through the system as she can not afford a private adoption, and would take a black baby today!!

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  • Black babies are usually shipped to China to play basketball in exchange for Chinese female babies that are put to work in sweat shops and massage parlors.

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