Advice for a struggling bipolar girl trying to stay true to God?

I've been raised my whole life with a faith in God...although I never grew up in church or was baptized, and my parents were anything but models in my life. My father died when I was 6 or 7 and I suppose I suppressed how much it actually affected me and didn't realize it. Growing up my mom sometimes physically and verbally abused me, my family is poor and far from perfect but at the same time I guess I'm lucky in a lot of ways because I have my family...however I'm often depressed and lonely, I feel as though I've been used....after straying from my faith in the Lord recently got into a relationship that was taken way to fast, physically, and I felt used afterwards and depressed....I'm already have a past of cutting myself since the 3rd grade and almost cutting into one of my veins about a year ago. I was in a deep depressed within the last month or so....where ever I would walk or go it was like this black cloud was hanging over me, but one day I was sitting in church with my grandma and usually I had gotten use to not even wanting to hear or listen to the pastor...but I sat their in complete desperation and just started calling out for Jesus in my thoughts, praying....and suddenly things started to feel a bit better...and a few weeks went by and I got a call from this counselor saying I was getting free CNA training and I'm pretty set for my future....but I recently met this new guy who is EXACTLY like my ex boyfriend (who used me)...and he seems so nice and tells me he wants to go to church but at the same time he is really honest about his past and drug use and how many people he has slept with, and I feel like I'm being tempted back into this same exact situation as before. He has made it very clear that he is seeking to eventually have a relationship with me...I don't want to lead him on in a friendship but I don't want to get drawn back into the same bad situation as before....I feel like it's just incredibly ironic how much this guy resembles my ex. I want to abstain from sexual relationships because I'm so young (18 and in college) and it seemed to really mess with my head losing my virginity ...

I want so bad to follow the Lord but it seems that the whole world is cracking up and I don't know any other Christians, all my friends are either Atheist or Agnostic or they don't follow a good path.

The only times I've really felt comfortable lately is when I am at church, I feel this calling to help people and walk with the Lord but it seems like all these negative forces are trying to hold me back? Like my own compassion and love for people is being used against me by the world.

6 Answers

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  • -
    Lv 5
    8 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    IMO,.......

    Our brain has the fight-or-flight response/syndrome to help us overcome rare emergency life-or-death situations, eg stumbling upon a tiger in the jungle or getting into a serious car-accident. During such a situation, our brain automatically produces certain brain chemicals(endorphin, dopamine, adrenalin, cortisol, etc) that cause fearlessness, painlessness, increased energy, increased strength, increased concentration, alertness, confidence, etc. The effect is quite manic. This manic response is temporary and may last for 2-4 weeks as our brain can't sustain excessive production of such brain chemicals.

    .......I think modern-day stressful living and wrong life decisions can cause someone to enter into such a situation and later may become addicted to its exhiliarating and manic effects; leading to the cyclical Bipolar Disorder or Manic-Depression.

    ....... Drug-highs is also similar to mania. So, it is common for BD/MD sufferers to become drug addicts or alcoholics or chain-smokers.

    Most people accept BD/MD as a chemical imbalance in the brain that causes mania. Then psych prescribe psychotropic pills that dull/suppress the brain's activity. I think such prescriptions will only compound the problem, eg drug-dependence, tolerance-effect and withdrawal symptoms.

    Some people do have chemical imbalance in their brains. But this is usually inherited from their foreparents who were chain-smokers, alcoholics, heavy coffee-drinkers or drug-addicts. This is bc long-term use of psychotropic drugs will cause deficiencies in certain brain chemicals due to the brain's negative-feedback mechanism. This deficient trait is then passed on to their babies who suffer from withdrawal symptoms, eg "crack-babies" and "meth-babies".

    ....... The solution for such "brain-damaged" children is to accept their deficient condition and act accordingly; or to continue the "family tradition" of substance abuse with maintenance-dosage.

    _ _ _ _ _ _ _

    Sometimes we are our worst enemy. If we or our forebears commit law-breaking, curses/punishments from God will ensue.(DEUTERONOMY 28:15 & 28:1-2)

    1COR 6:9-10 = Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God.

    It is wise, not to engage in pre-marital sex, which is sexual fornication. This will prevent heart-breaks.

    Boys do not fall in love, they only fall in lust. The best that a good boy can offer his gf/wife is the bff kind of love or "love her as himself".

    Cf, GENESIS 3:16 = To the woman He said: “I will greatly multiply your sorrow and your conception;

    In pain you shall bring forth children; Your desire shall be for your husband, And he shall rule over you.”

    For a girl, falling in love with the wrong boy will cause long-term emotional damage.

    Modern society and culture has delayed marriage, many years after puberty. Permissiveness, hedonism and narcissism in Western culture abounds. This has caused most boys to become sexual "predators". There are very few good and God-fearing boys who will commit to their gf's for so many years in their youthful relationship until they are ready for marriage.

    ....... So, it is better for a girl to err on the side of caution and avoid pre-marital sex, unless the girl is very sure of her bf's faithfulness. The other alternative is to get the boy to marry the girl early.

    The key to a brighter life is to repent and follow God and His commandments/words.

    JOHN 6:63 = "It is the Spirit who gives life; the flesh profits nothing. The words that I speak to you are spirit, and they are life."

    ....... God = Holy Spirit(God in Spirit-form) = Jesus Christ(God in human-form). God is like Transformer, who can change His form.

    Peace.

  • ?
    Lv 7
    8 years ago

    The Bible is a strengthening aid for many who suffer from "disquieting thoughts." (Psalm 94:17-19, 22) Cherie, for example, found Psalm 72:12, 13 to be particularly encouraging. There, the psalmist states about God's appointed King, Jesus Christ: "He will deliver the poor one crying for help, also the afflicted one and whoever has no helper. He will feel sorry for the lowly one and the poor one, and the souls of the poor ones he will save." Cherie was also encouraged by the words of the apostle Paul recorded at Romans 8:38, 39: "I am convinced that neither death nor life nor angels nor governments nor things now here nor things to come nor powers nor height nor depth nor any other creation will be able to separate us from God's love."

    Elaine, a bipolar patient, finds her relationship with God to be an anchor. She is greatly comforted by the words of the psalmist: "A heart broken and crushed, O God, you will not despise." (Psalm 51:17) "It has truly been a comfort to know that our loving heavenly Father, Jehovah, understands," she says. "It has been strengthening to draw close to him in prayer, especially in times of great anxiety and distress."

    As can be seen, living with a mood disorder presents unique challenges. However, Cherie and Elaine found that prayerful reliance on God along with appropriate treatment enabled them to improve their lot in life. How, though, can family members and friends help those who suffer from bipolar disorder or depression?

  • john
    Lv 4
    8 years ago

    That's too bad. You should have more faith in yourself.

  • Anonymous
    8 years ago

    Have you gone to a psychiatrist for your depression and cutting? You need medical treatment for that.

    Please go see one if you have not. Depression and bipolar disorder can be very dangerous illnesses if left untreated, as your cutting shows.

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  • 8 years ago

    Take your meds on time and do not stop taking them.

  • Anonymous
    8 years ago

    just don't have sex.

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