Ruwani asked in Arts & HumanitiesPoetry · 9 years ago

please tell me what you think of this poem i wrote.cheers.?

Life As he knew it.

By Ru Hewage

Where the lemonade stand- stood,

There was a man of seven days,

He lived his life on a penny round,

Swirling in a teacup found.

Monday was a clumsy affair,

With bits and bobs,

A wife, bills and a bailiff,

Swirling, twirling and then some.

Tuesday wasn’t much better,

Wednesday much worse,

Thursday was asleep,

But then Friday came.

He popped up some toast,

Poured in some juice,

Said enough’s- enough!,

Then started to shake.

But shake you said,

No wait- that’s just not it,

This shake was a beat,

To a step quite quick,

Come along Saturday

He sang forgetting his frown,

Come bloody well along,

Will dance into Sunday

And then – go get us some church.

2 Answers

  • Anonymous
    9 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    Loved it!

    With an engaging theme and rhythm, it brilliantly combines everyday speech and poetic skills. The image of the teacup is exactly right. Worth several readings: joy!

  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    It reminds me of Ernest Hemingway. He had that whole disjointed Dick and Jane thing going too. See Dick. See Dick run. Run dick run. Eh.

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