How to handle this sort of situation...what would you do?

Im 17, and I am completely in love with this girl who I am really close to. When I told her how I felt, she said she cant have a relationship because she hates relationships. Although we are still really close, because we arent officially together loads of other guys are constantly trying it on with her and I just sit back and watch because I dont have a right to step in because she isnt officially my girlfriend.

Its because she had a bad break up with another guy, and ever since she hates relationships. Its tearing me up not being with her though, and that fact she has that freedom of it not being official means when she goes to partys without me I feel sick because there are so many guys who will try it on with her.

I dont know what to do, Im completely in love with her and she is the nicest girl in the world. But I cant stop thinking about her and its have a very heavy effect on my life, particularly my education. I really need your advice...Ive never ever felt like this about a girl before.

Dont tell me to give up on her, as its just not doable. Im too deeply in love with her to simply push the whole thing aside :(

7 Answers

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  • Anonymous
    9 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    You seem like a sweetheart<3 this is what I'm going through, except I am a girl. And it's a guy... Well DO NOT give up on her. Ask her: why do you hate relationships? What could I do to make you happy? And other questions like that.

    Maybe start holding her hand. Make promises to her. Like, you promise to never hurt her, and you promise you'll love her forever. Cute promises, that you can ensure.

    You will get her. I promise. Maybe do something. Maybe, you could act sad around her. And if he asks what wrong, say "you wouldn't understand". And if she keeps asking tell her your situation without names. So she knows it's about her, and yet you won't say it is. Makes sense? <3 good luck, James. I wish you the best.

  • 9 years ago

    Hey sorry to say but I once was like that too had the worst relationship ever atleast to me it was took along time to give any guy a chance. But if your persistent trust deep down she knows maybe your good for her but she's thinking she is too screwed up to be with you. She is just afraid of doing this whole thing all over again only in the end to possibly lose her friend and having another bad relationship. There isn't really anything you can do except keep showing your love for her and be a liitle more patient. It took six months for me to finally say yes to my current boyfriend. But it also took me 3 years to actually get out of the I hate relationship funk too. God bless it'll work out.

  • 9 years ago

    hmm you've already told her how you feel, if it's space you need then that's what you should do. and dont let it affect your education.. im really like a guy as well and i cant wait until he rings me and we hang out, but seriously you're education is your life and you should not let anyone come in the way..

    it's really hard for me to concentrate sometimes but it's important and you probably have goals and aspirations, so good luck, the rest is up to you. :)

  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    Mate, only a complete spaz would tell you to give up. Try to tell her how you feel, just say, 'Look, I know you aren't keen on relationships, but I'm not like him. I'll treat you properly, like you deserve.' stuff like that. She'll come round, and you sound like a nice guy, so keep trying :)

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  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    Its time you sit down and tell her everything you said here. If shes still not ready or doesnt want a relationship then its time to move on. It may hurt but it will be better than this.

  • 9 years ago

    remain a close friend to her while you find yourself a hard labour working making some decent money, in a few years of rigorous saving buy a house with a nice quite dungeon, invite her over to dinner and drug her, tying her down in your basement, she will be yours forever :D

    Source(s): life experience
  • 9 years ago

    You can love her and be there for her. Don't be jealous ! Show her how you feel. Do the little things others don't do,

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