Why doesn't PLENTY OF FISH work for me?
I make a REAL effort on the online dating site PLENTY OF FISH. But no matter how much I read women's profiles, how much thought I put into my messages, how much I try women ignore me. Of the few that would message me they lose interest after a few messages.
Is it me?
Is it because I'm 5'6"?
What am I doing wrong?
- Anonymous8 years agoFavorite Answer
Ok, what I'm gonna say, will open your eyes...and make women think I'm a prick... oh well.
My first advice, is stop seeing women as these innocent fragile things that they pretend to be...there not....girls are very bitchy and often the hotter they are the more they are. These "fragile creatures" would sooner drop you as soon as something better comes along (but so would men, it's in everyone's genetics to reproduce with the best that's on offer). Anyway I say this because I've seen it....This advise could be seen as a little biased because I'm very bitter toward women at the moment, but bare with me
I've been on pof for a while, but I also go out as well. And the type of girls I pull easily when out will just ignore me on pof...why...because there always on there looking for their Brad Pitt. So if you don't look anything above an 8 you may not have luck.
Now us guys are our own worst enemies....why....well, u should ask some girls about the type of messages they get......"hey sexy"......"ur hot"......."what's the chances of me hanging at the back of u tonight" you know all that kind of bull. No matter the crap some of us guys come up with we are still feeding their egos and this ego trip they get becomes addictive like a drug.
My ex is on there. She was getting 150+ emails a day. She would say she hasn't got time to answer them all......ok that is a fair point, and one us guys have to consider. However, what about the women your not into that send you messages, you feel you'll be polite because you don't won't to be rude, so you respond......oh whats this......they ignore you to.....ok, whats their excuse???
Ill tell ya.. this is the way pof works...us guys fuel girls egos, but in return we are ignored. Good looking guys that could do better than a lot of the girls on there, start to feel worthless and start to become insecure about themselves and then look to lower their standards.......what happens then...... your dating a 1 or a 2....this has a knock on effect, these girls have an ego trip and then start to think there a 5 or a 6 which in turn means that the guys who are 1's and 2's are now being ignored because the girls think they can do better.
You should try this...find the hottest girls you can, you know the ones that you know will ignore you, and send them insults. This is not me trying to make men be pricks to women, because believe it or not I do enjoy women's company, probably more than I do mens. The reason I say this is because you will get a response to your message. Just an interesting experiment I tried :S
The thing is hot girls get the same type of message daily, and your know this type, because their have quite a bitchy message saying "stop sending boring messages, and come up with something new" now your thinking, ok ill be creative and spend time on my message....WRONG...why....straight away you've just lost, because your doing exactly what she's told you to do, so straight away she has the power and is the one in charge...guess what....women don't find that attractive.
I learnt recently that what a girl says and what she wants are 2 different things. Now girls will deny this, and yeah....ok on certain points they mean what they say. But when they say they know the guy they want, really they haven't a clue, because it will change all the time. I'm not saying ignore all their advice altogether because some girls do have a good idea, no matter how rough it is. So when a girl is saying "say something new", shes right you do need to, because you need to stand out....I contradict myself.....First I tell you your wrong to say something new, and now Im saying you have to. Well the ones that are telling you to say something new, generally I don't bother with, purely because I haven't got enough hours in the day to put up with their rubbish. The girls that I stand out to are the ones that I WANT TO and on MY terms and not on theirs.
My advice to all men is to just stop....stop the needless compliments, that they don't deserve, and this is because they haven't earned them. Besides whats the point saying "your hot" to them........guess what.......THEY KNOW......the 150+ emails a day is telling them so. So stop feeding their egos!!!!
This bit is for us guys out there, so girls you can stop reading now :p xx
Guys we need to remove their egos, and stop sending compliments. I say this, but I know it will never happen. Women say the type of man they want and men will change to be that guy, and when they get bored of that type, they'll then say I want a different type of guy, and us guys being idiots will blindly try and be that too. As soon as we open our eyes, the sooner this will change.
I hope this has helped opened your eyes, if you read as far as this and truely understand it, I hope you will start to think about what your saying to women and what I hope more than anything else, is that we will stop blindly being moulded into a woman's ideal.
- 4 years ago
1. Don't put women on a pedistal. Do not compliment all the time especially when you don't know them. Women and people in general like to be valued for who they are not necessarily what they look like. Just by messaging a woman for the first time is already insinuating that you find them attractive so a paragraph about how beautiful she is will just make you come across as shallow.
Bottom line: a compliment is better received and appreciated when they're given at appropriate times and as you discover more about each other. That doesn't mean go down the insult route! No one deserves that from someone they barely know and you don't know how damaging it may be on their self esteem.
2. Go for girls who match your personality and strike up a conversation. It's all well and good to get annoyed about the lack of replies but, if your interests and location are worlds apart then can you really blame them?
3. Don't take it personally, people test the water with these sites allthe time.
- 4 years ago
This Site Might Help You.
Why doesn't PLENTY OF FISH work for me?
I make a REAL effort on the online dating site PLENTY OF FISH. But no matter how much I read women's profiles, how much thought I put into my messages, how much I try women ignore me. Of the few that would message me they lose interest after a few...Source(s): doesn 39 plenty fish work me: https://tinyurl.im/MwV5V
- 6 years ago
Matthew is correct, I couldn't have said it better myself. But it doesn't end there. Facebook, Instagram, Tinder, and all the crap like that is doing the same thing. Average looking girl puts a new pic and get 30 likes and 20 compliments. AVERAGE!!!!! like a 5, if your wondering what I'm talking about google "women's looks on a scale from 1 to 10" This sh*t's gotten ridicules.
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- ohsowhateverLv 58 years ago
I was on Plenty of Fish for 5yrs, all it did was cause me to become depressed, I discovered there a lot of players on this site, both female and males. For some people I think it is a form of entertainment, I eventually went off of the site and stayed off for a year. Then decided to go back on, I was on only three days when I met someone, we have been seeing each other for six months and things are getting serious. If things dont work out for us, I would never ever go back to POF
- SusanLv 44 years ago
Your friend is right. There are plenty more fish in the sea. But they school in packs so its hard to tell who's available... and some are sharks so be careful. And few others are real Oysters. Fight for the pearl, man. (the beauty within is what i was going for but it sunded dirty when i read it back to myself) but of course I decided to leave it. I'm being supportive of your maleness.
- 4 years ago
Having the same trouble. I rarely message anyone though. I know that doesnt work so I wait for someone to message me...that doesnt seem to work either, had 3 messages in 4 months and only off overweight grannies. I know I can do much better as Ive dated 8s an 9s on the looks scale in the past 10 years.
- CWLv 46 years ago
The administrators at POF are a joke. I've had my profile deleted 10 times with them but never once with OKCupid. Never had a complaint on Craigslist or any other dating sites like Match.Com. POF is at the bottom of the dating world.
- 4 years ago
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- 4 years ago
I was told that prof is the new way of dating,never got a response I m not handing over a dime to get a date that s prostatution still dating the normal way Church supermarket work dog park beach I truly believed my friend it just doesn t t work for career daters.