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How would you survive and safe face if this happened to you?

Let's say that you are experiencing one of those days that is completely awesome. You got your 8 hours of rest, you had a nice breakfast, a sumptuous lunch, and work flew by so you left feeling productive.

It is now 5:30 PM and you're thinking what you're going to do for the rest of the evening. Since you're feeling frisky, you decide to call your crush and ask if they want to hang out. To your delight, they agreed.

It is now 6 PM and you just finished taking the best shower you've ever had. You're feeling clean, you're smelling good, and you're about to throw on your best attire.

It is now 6:30 and you're feeling hungry. You decide to head to Taco Bell for dinner, and since you're having an awesome day, you decide to get an awesome meal - two soft-shelled tacos with spicy meat, and extra spicy hot sauce. You finish your meal and drive over to meet your crush.

It's now 7 PM and you've finally arrived at your destination. While walking towards your crush's apartment, your heart starts racing and you become giddy with excitement.

You knock on your crush's door and when they open it, you're met with a showered, nice-smelling person of your dreams. You and your crush decide to have some wine and watch a movie. After 2-3 glasses of wine, you and your crush begin to feel tipsy, so you begin making out. Things are getting hot and heavy, so an intimate encounter with the person of your dreams is about to happen.

As you begin to undress, your stomach starts growling loudly. All of a sudden, you're stomach is feeling funny, and your worst fear is realized.....that awesome Taco Bell meal you had at 6:30 is making its way down.You decide that you can no longer hold it in, so you excuse yourself and ask your crush to use their bathroom. Looking disappointed, your crush tells you to go ahead. As you hurry and make your way to your bathroom, a fart that you were holding in slipped out and to make matters worse....your crush heard it (but you were in too much of a rush to be embarrassed).

It is now 7:35 PM and three seconds after you closed the bathroom door, you undressed and sat yourself on the toilet....and exploded. To your horror, your explosion was so loud that you can sense that your crush can hear you. You figure that at this point, the "butt-pinching" technique you've used in the past to minimize noise in the past is basically useless.

It is now 7:44 PM and you're finally done. Although you're feeling relieved (and 10 lbs lighter), you're mortified because you're certain your crush heard your transgressions. You open your door and discovered that your crush was so disgusted, that they don't want to get intimate with you anymore.

In a bout of shame, you excuse yourself and decide to go home. On your way home, you begin to curse your luck because you just blew it (literally and figuratively) with the person of your dreams.

How would you save face if you were in this situation?

3 Answers

  • Anonymous
    8 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    Oh my god, honey I am so sorry! I feel really bad, these kind of things can ruin a relationship before you are comfortable and know eachother. If it had been me, I would have been so embarressed for and you and myself, but we are all humans and hopefully she can get over it, I guarantee the same things has happened to her but maybe not in front of someone. My man and I have been together for 3 years and were way past that, if he was sick I would wipe is butt, yeah, gross, but he's my man and I love him. This happened in Along Came Polly, with Ben Stiller and Jennifer Aniston, she got over it haha. I personally think its really hilarious, and part of life, I just read your post to my boyfriend and we think its funny and endearing. If she really likes you, she will get over it, she poops too! She gets sick too! You should text her, she'd probably feel less embarressed this way too, and tell her you got food poisening from spicy food and were sick the rest of the night, she will feel sorry for you!! Also apologize for destroying her bathroom and you feel really embarressed, but your only human just like her, and you got sick and could not help it. I really like you and hope this did not ruin my chances with you. It was literally my, and everyone's worst nightmare. So sorry, and embarressed, and hopeful that you still want to date me.

    You sound like you genuinely like this girl, there is no way to save face, and you don't have to, this happens to everyone and shes a snobby priss if she doesn't want to be around after that. She's human too and should understand.

    Source(s): Along Came Polly haha
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  • 8 years ago


    (sorry--I can imagine the look on her face when you opened the bathroom door)

    You may be trolling....still, thanks for the laugh.

    If you weren't--I'm not sure you can really "save" this one. Just remember not to eat TB before a date, next time. Or on valentine's day, give her an air freshener as a joke (sometimes being able to laugh at yourself works wonders lol)

    Good luck!

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  • Ash
    Lv 4
    8 years ago

    You were stupid to have ate hot and spicy food at any time. But especially at a time such as that. Im glad you had an A$s-plosive good time. I bet you could have Sh!t through a screen door.

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