Are both of these friendships over? PLEASE ANSWER I NEED DIRE HELP!!!!!!! I'll answer yours too!!!!!!?

Okay, this is kind of long, but I really appreciate the help!

My friend, Alex and I, have a complicated relationship. We punch each other, and playfully tease each other all of the time. He likes me, and I just recently started liking him. Yesterday, I screwed that completely up. My friend Maureen liked him WAY longer than I did, and was upset with him liking me. Yesterday our school had a social event, to where everyone had to come into the gym. Alex refused to sit anywhere but next to me. Maureen was furious, and she was almost crying the entire time. I tried to tell him to stay away from me, so I could comfort her. He didn't get the hint, so I made gay insults toward him (his friend is gay, and he plays along so it's hilarious). She kept telling me that he liked me, and she made up this fake name John, ( Alex is John ) and kept saying "John likes you" and "I hate John". I didn't want to make things worse, so I said that I didn't like John at all, to calm her down. He kept asking "Who's John" over and over, and we made up this fake story for who John is. He wanted to talk to me and ask me what was wrong, so I told him I'd tell him at the choir concert 3 hours later.

At the concert, I screwed myself. He asked me what was wrong, and I told him that Maureen was jealous of me spending so much time with me. He was JUST ABOUT TO LEAVE, and I told him he was John. He said, "Well, that explains a lot." and he continued to tell me this story when he was put into a similar situation. In the end to his story, what would be Maureen and I ended up hating each other.

PLEASE I do not want to lose my two best friends, what can I do to salvage these friendships? Also, I just realized I like him, so I dont want to tell either one that I like Alex just yet. Maureen was practically crying when she caught him staring at me at the concert, I don't want to make her burst out crying when I tell her I like him!

Thank you so much, I really appreciate all of your answers.

23 Answers

  • 9 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    Do you read your question one time?try it

  • 9 years ago

    This situation im afraid is out of your control there is nothing u can do without someone getting hurt. Your freind maureen is being very selfish by making u feel guilty for liking this guy and why should u feel guilty? u like each other thats not your fault thats just what happens in life. At the end of the day if she is a true freind to u then she will support u and not let this get in the way of your freindship after all thats only one guy theres plenty more about. Stop blaming yourself u have not screwed anything up u cant help the way she feels or the fact that alex likes u thats not your fault.

    It doesnt matter if she liked him first the point is he likes u and u like him. Although it may be hard at first u must put your own interests first. im sure she would do the same if she was in your position. If this cant be resolved with your friend then it may be time to get a new friend because if she was true to u she wouldnt let a guy come between your friendship and make u feel this way. Remember Its not your fault he likes u. She will get over it in time...if he isnt with u then hes going to be with someone else eventually and its not likely it will be her so if she takes it out on you then its her loss not yours. You dont need friends like that... Good luck with this :)

    Source(s): experience
  • 9 years ago

    First off, being honest is the first thing you need to do ,,,, with yourself and with Maureen. She already knows that Alex has the hots for you and that he is not interested in her. Those feeling of rejection (between her and Alex) are her issue and she is going to have to deal with them in her own way. There is no way to help her get over her heartache - that is something she's gonna have to deal with all on her own. Now, the question become "are you going to let a boy come between you and her?" Sometimes, it just can't be helped. You only have two choices here: be with Alex (if you like him) or keep you relationship platonic. If you start something romantic with Alex than you risk your friendship with Maureen. You can't make him (alex) feel something for her (maureen) that he doesn't...nor should you ignore your feelings either. Just remember that when people have their feeling hurt the often pull away for a while. So if one, or the other, does this don't take it personally. She will respect you more for being honest with her about your feels for Alex.

  • 9 years ago

    Tell Maureen that being in your situation is just as painful as being in hers.

    But only if that's true.

    Tell her that while she feels like she's not good enough for Alex, and she feels betrayed, you feel torn apart by what both seem to be wrong choices.

    Beware that if you and Alex have a relationship, Maureen may still like him.

    Make sure you really do like Alex, not just the idea of you liking Alex and Alex liking you. Ya feel me?

    Sat Maureen down and just talk. Serious conversations can be awkward, but when they're with best friends, you can easily confide and trust.

    Follow your heart.<3

    I wish you the best!

    Source(s): Being in situations as you & more recently, Maureen.
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  • 9 years ago

    If the only way you can remain friends with Maureen is not liking Alex, then if you want to keep herm stop. However, she wouldn't be a good friend of she didn't let you like the guy you do. This is a very hard decision and you also have to think about how Alex will feel. Don't leave him out and think about how he would react. I always think coming clean is a good idea but here, you may want to keep thins to yourself until they both calm down. It does seem like Alex likes you so don't let him go so easily.

    Most importantly, you're still young. Friends come and go and you won't have the same ones forever. If one doesnt want to continue being friends with you, don't beat yourself up about it or blame yourself. It's their choice.

    Can you try to help me out?;_ylt=AuNhF...

  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    If Alex likes you, then I dont think he's gonna change his mind just because Maureen is crying over him. And if Maureen is a friend , then she will understand that you like him too, and hopefully back away. It might hurt for her, but then she will have to understand. I know what you're going through, I went through this too! And if Maureen will not budge then, I guess you're going to have to explain to her that Alex dos not like her, and probably wont.Just try and tell Maureen that Alex doesnt like her. Hopefully she gets it!

    Good Luck :]

  • 9 years ago

    A guy like Alex will get over it trust me but Maureen i don't know about but i can say if she is a true friend she will get over it. besides all friendships have bumps in the road.

    Source(s): i am a guy
  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    It seems like you're still young, let the situation cool down a bit. I am in a similar situation, and so far I'm just letting things stay the same by being just friends. If you can, try to talk it out together. It's not your fault that he likes you and not Maureen. Just keep it cool for now. Answer mine please?;_ylt=AghOj...

  • 9 years ago

    Well it seems that no matter what you do someone is going to be upset. He likes you maureen likes him and you like him. It is you can choose between them or get rid of them both. But maybe just talk to both of them and explain that this is stupid and you should remain friends.

  • 9 years ago

    You should be honest with your feelings instead of covering them up whenever your friend says stuff. By reading this your a caring friend and you value your friendship above all . You also need to be happy too. If she is a true friend she'll understand that one can not make someone love them. The guy chose you and maybe its best to explain the situation to him. You can do it :) Just be confident.

    Source(s): experience
  • 9 years ago

    Saving both makes this complicated. . .I'd say that you should see if Alex likes your friend. If he does, back off. If he doesn't, your either going to have to let him go, or tell your friend that, and hope she realizes that it's better for both you and Alex to go out because he doesn't like her. She may hate you for a while, and be warned, you could look like a man stealing b*tch. More details on if he likes her or not would help. I'll update if you want me to. Answer mine?

    Source(s): Common Sense
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