Does the mother of my son's homosexual boyfriend have a right to judge me for "letting" my son beat on her son?
My son and his ex-boyfriend Kevin are 25 years old, they have been together since high school. I'm aware that my son has been cheating AND beating on Kevin for years. But I chose to mind my business because they're both grown. I got other things on my plate. I have mortgage, bills and car insurance to pay. I also have a 19 year old, a 15 year old and a 10 year old to raise. I'm a single woman and I work hard to make ends meet. I've ALSO been letting my son and his boyfriend live in my house for over 6 years. It was crowded in my house and Lord knows it rarely ever stayed properly cleaned but I dealt with it just like I dealt with all the fighting and arguing between my son and Kevin. Plus my younger kids all have issues too with school and their behavior. Look, I was just damn stressed and this is what I get for being nice to folks.
Last year Kevin finally earned his associate's degree. It took him five damn years to finish a 2 year college but he did it, so I'm happy for him. Before the new year came, he was hired as a substitute teacher. Once he got that job, he packed his things and left my son one day while he was at work. My son was angry and he started making threats so Kevin to file a restraining order on him. I just told my son to calm down and don't do nothing stupid. I told him to let Kevin go and make a life for himself. I was nice enough not to press him for any money after 6 years of living in my house. Kevin is staying at his mother's house now. MY SON helped me pay bills, Kevin never gave me a DIME. But at least he went to school and looked after my younger kids I'll give him credit for that. Kevin's mother is on social security and food stamps. This woman had the nerve to send me a email cussing me out and calling me names and harassing me for not stopping my son from beating her son up. This is coming from the same woman who kicked Kevin out for being gay! I took him in right away out of love for my son and because I ain't no prejudice. I should go over there and whoop that woman's behind but I'm 47 years old. I should be past nonsense like that. That's why I've been single for 8 years because I don't need no man and all that drama. I've been beat and cheated on too. I'm DONE with it. Personally, I think Kevin's momma is trying to benefit off of whatever little but of money her son will be making with this sub-teaching job. I hold my own weight and don't depend on no damn body. But everybody wants to ask me for favors and I'm too much of a sucker to say no. With that being said, do you think I handled things right these past several years or am I missing something? How could Kevin's mother be right?
- Allan CLv 69 years agoFavorite Answer
1/ It was extremely generous of you to take in Kevin when his mom threw him out. You didn't have to.
2/ If your son was cheating and beating on Kevin, you were an enabler. I know you were in a difficult situation but this kind of behaviour on the part of your son being okay and accepted by you sent a not so great message to your younger children. Your son and his boyfriend are both adults and could have moved out on their own.
3/ That Kevin helped by looking after your younger children is a credit in his favour. You might have worked a better deal with him and your son to help out around the house.
4/ Now, after all they put you through and Kevin has graduated and is no longer your son's boyfriend; he's moved out.
Delete all messages from Kevin's mother. Don't put any energy into them at all. Kevin is now working and back at home. He is no longer your concern.
You are obviously a strong woman and you have other kids to look after. Spend your time and energy on them.
PS: I know he is your son, but I don't think much of anything good about your eldest son. Cheating and domestic violence are not acceptable behaviour for anyone in a relationship. The fact that he dragged you into it too by living in your home, doesn't say anything good about him either.
Good luck to you.
- 9 years ago
That lady is doing some mental disturbance to you.
She is pushing, trying too hard, to say your son turned her son into gay.
Best to take your chill pill, let her do whatever she wants as long she doesn't do physical harm.
She is waiting for you to go crazy before she sparks the fireworks.
On the other hand, let her spark the fireworks and you landing a 5cent worth of palm on her cheeks.
Hopefully your son will be able to forget Kevin and move on.
- AnnLv 79 years ago
Wow! you have 2 kids that beat their spouses in your home?A gay and straight son both beating their spouse. Well, if you were my mother I would probably beat someone also.
Don't worry, I called YA CPS on you and they will take care of getting your other kids out of the house. We don't want their spouses beat also.
Go to Chuck E. Cheese and witness some new beatings and then write about them here.
- 9 years ago
Just let it slide and move on also I applaud you for being ok with your son being gay and letting his boyfriend stay with you(im not gay) and also I think you could've handled you're son hitting his boyfriend a little better
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- Anonymous9 years ago
I really have no interest in your trailer park drama.
@Eva hey steady on there :P
- Anonymous9 years ago
you're a bad mother, allowing violence is idiotic
- evaohellLv 79 years ago
<-----I'm with Stupid (jon)