This guy I just met, he's clinically depressed. PLEASE HELP!?
I met a guy almost a week ago. We started talking more and I discovered he was clinically depressed. For a long time now, a couple of years. It seems like he's having a lot of trouble with his parents and at home, he doesn't talk about it a lot but he will if I ask him. I'm worried, I barely know this guy but I feel like I want to be there for him. I'm scared I might chase him off but I just care about him, I don't want him to kill him self? But every time I talk to him, I feel like I look obsessed or weird because I barely know him but yet I want to help him. I'm really confused, he's a nice guy.., he sounds so empty when he talks to anyone. He smiles a lot when we talk though. Any idea on what I should do? My mom says I should leave him alone and focus on my own problems... (I used to be depressed a year ago).
I'm not looking for a relationship at all, I'm happy single and independent. I'm worried and confused on whether or not I want to be his friend because I want to help him since he doesn't deserve it, or because his personality is amazing. Is it wrong to want to be someone's friend so they don't feel this way?
- Anonymous9 years agoFavorite Answer
If you feel that his depression is going to drag you down and destroy you, than keep a small distance and try not to get too involved. However, there's nothing wrong with lending an ear and being supportive...he won't be creeped out, trust me. In fact, he will be amazed that someone he just met cares about him so much. You sound like an amazing girl, seriously. I think that if you want a relationship with him though, it might be too heavy and too much. He needs to get better and more stable before you two can have a healthy, 50/50 loving relationship...if you think he's worth it, stick through it, because it'll be worth it. If not, theres NOTHING wrong with being there for him.
- Anonymous9 years ago
The answer is easy: if you like him a bit, then be there for a bit, if you like him very much, be there much - you will not chase him off if you are honest, do not exaggerate your feelings, just let him know that there is a person who cares about him.
Do not rush things though, as depressed people need quite some time to believe that the other person's feelings are genuine - i should know about that, being diagnosed with depressions for quite some time..
Your mom wants you to take care of your own problems, that is a very good advice too, mainly bc you should be stable enough to be a caring person for the guy and at the same time being able to get your own life on track - the guy cannot help you there much and your mom seems to be afraid that you are not strong enough to fulfill both tasks.
So look inside yourself carefully: To you have enough energy and willpower to get it all done - bc if your answer is "no" then you really should focus on your own problems first.
But if you say that you can and want to handle it: Go for it and spend more time with him!
- Anonymous9 years ago
Give him a kiss that will make him feel better i am serious. But just do a lot more touching and it will make him feel better. Give him a hug, hugs make people feel better. Do something fun with him, go bowling. Doing that will take his mind off his depression.
- becLv 49 years ago
help, him. if i knew someone was hurting i would help, but thats my nature. some people tell me i care to much about people, but thats part of me, i have a big heart, i just cant not care.
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- LilJoeLv 59 years ago
alot of guys do that to keep you stranging along.Suggest he go to a doctor for depression.I had a girlfriend I was seeing and she had that.AS long as she stayed on her meds she was alright, she would get off them and go bonkers.I finally got tired of it and moved on.