Do you think adultery should always be confessed?

If a spouse commits adultery but he promises himself that he will never cheat again, do you think he should still confess it even if it means his marriage might end and his children will become the product of a broken home?

I read in a marriage book that recommended a spouse not confess his infidelity (so long as he doesn't ever do it again) on the grounds that its worse to risk ending the marriage and putting his children through that pain.

What is your opinion?

9 Answers

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  • Anonymous
    9 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    i would advise, as wrong as it sounds, to keep it to himself. I can relate to him as i made a mistake like this and to this day every day is a misery. I confessed and i can not have the true love of my life back. If you can imagine the impact on the whole family, the years and years it takes to repair, the sickening look he will get for simply breathing, the hell every day of their lives would be..i do strongly suggest if he regrets and knows how much of an ill decision he made, to keep it to himself and to get past what has happened. I cant even read posts like these anymore without feeling sick and upset about what happened to me. I made a mistake, and trust me, once a cheater always a cheater is NOT the case. I would walk to the end of the earth just to see my love again. I would never even contemplate doing anything like it again. If i could turn back time to the point where youre at, i would pay a thousand million pounds to keep it all to myself. I

  • 9 years ago

    I think it's awfully convenient for someone to use their children as justification for not telling their spouse about their adultery, because they sure weren't thinking about those kids when they were out there scr*wing someone else, were they?

    People have a right to know if they're married to an untrustworthy scumbag.

  • Yes. The cheater made a choice to screw someone else. Why shouldn't his/her partner also get a choice? A choice on whether to stay or not. Violating someone's trust like that is terrible. Not to mention the risk of STD's.

  • 9 years ago

    I agree with the book. In this circumstance, the overriding question should be whether telling would be more helpful or harmful. When a person feels true regret, and feels certain not to repeat the mistake, there is no positive benefit to be gained from telling.

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  • 4 years ago

    you do no longer want him to assert it, you already think of he did and you do no longer have confidence him. If I have been you i might pass to counseling the two without or with your husband. you do no longer choose to destroy a marriage over fake suspicions, yet you of course had at one time been given a reason to no longer have confidence him. you will possibly be able to desire to unravel the challenge. The extra you pry the extra obsessed you will get. Been there, finished that. My guy had bare photos of a woman he grew to become into speaking to on line and texting. when I found out I lef him even nevertheless he claimed he on no account cheated. He pursued me and later got here returned. when I have been given returned I nonetheless felt he grew to become into cheating, and at that component he extremely wasn't. i might verify is telephone, e mail, facebook, if he grew to become into previous due i might hardship. It drove me nuts, yet I merely stored doing it. sooner or later I instructed myself I had to provide up, and issues may well be ok no rely what. the certainty will pop out with no need to seek for it. After that, issues have been extra suitable. we've a extra suitable relationship, and that i don't experience i might desire to "undercover agent" on him or accuse him of issues.

  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    No. Confess to god. Go to sacremental confession if you are catholic or orthodox. Then never tall your husband and hope it doesn't come out, and spend the rest of your life making it up to him.

  • 9 years ago

    no

    people say they want to know,they really don't

    when i was going thru divorce,my soon to be ex wife confessed that she cheated on me.

    trust me,ignorance is bliss,i wish she never told me

  • 9 years ago

    Yeah.

  • **ek**
    Lv 7
    9 years ago

    no. deny, deny, deny

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