Should I pursue fraud charges against my mother?

I get disability for RSD and anxiety. Since I was 18 at the time, I was told that I had to have someone else be my payee. Of course, I put my mom in charge of it. In October I turned 19, and last week I finally changed the payee to myself. I opened my bank statement that had been sent to my mom, and learned that I had a balance of little over a hundred dollars. My medical bills have not been paid. I've only received $40 here and there for gas to go to my doctors appointments. So, I know that I have a case.

My problem is this... How can I do that to my mom?


In my situation I don't consider $10,ooo to be a small amount of money.

Update 2:

Sorry, I guess I didn't explain things when I said that I KNOW I HAVE A CASE. My Grandmother has paid for my food and allows me to live in her house rent free. I haven't been given any money for any of my needs (including clothing and any other damn thing that you can think of.) except for the aforementioned $40 for gas.

Whether I could or could not pursue fraud charges successfully was not at all my question. My question was whether it would be worth the ruined relationship to get that money back. I don't think anyone actually understood the point of this question.

7 Answers

  • Judith
    Lv 7
    8 years ago

    No and here's why. If you were living with her she had every right to use that money to help meet household expenses e.g. rent/mortgage payments, utilities and groceries. You don't say how much your benefit is but it is possible that it doesn't equal your fair share of these expenses. How to figure fair share? Add the household expenses up for the month and divide by the # of people living in the household. The result equals fair share and that is the amount of your benefit which could be used to meet your daily household needs.

    And if you weren't living with her then she was obviously using the money to cover immediate needs e.g. rent, utilities and groceries.

    I'm assuming that you also have the clothes that you need as well as a place to live and that you've been fed. The fact that you have some unpaid medical bills doesn't mean that she wasn't using the benefits appropriately. Social Security requires that the money first be used to meet daily needs and only when daily needs are met can the money be used to meet other expenses e.g. medical bills.

    Social Security will determine that she was using the money appropriately. How do I know? I was a social security claims rep for 32 years. I suspect that you won't like my answer but it's the one you'll get from Social Security.

    Source(s): Retired Social Security employee.
  • Reg V
    Lv 4
    8 years ago

    Do the math. Work out the total amount of benefit that was paid to you through your mom, take away the money that she gave you and set the balance against the medical bills that have yet to be paid. When you've got the full picture, talk to her and say "Look Mom, the medical bills haven't been paid yet you had all my money. What are you going to do about it. where has it gone." Listen to what she has to say and then decide what you have to do.

    At the end of the day, it's not you who's done anything wrong. If she hasn't got the money, because she has spent it, it's she who has the problem. She'll have to find it from somewhere or pay the price. You didn't get her into this mess, she got there herself and has to take responsibility for her behavior.

    Yes, she's your mom and you owe her a lot but whatever the mitigating circumstances, you and she have to work this out together.

  • Anonymous
    8 years ago

    Since your mother was your representative payee she can use some of your money to pay for food, housing, and even clothes for you , you will have to prove she was not using your money to help support you, and this will be very difficult. Now that you are your own payee you do not have to worry about it anymore, so move on from here, and manage your own income.

  • Anonymous
    8 years ago

    You probably could sue her, but only if you can somehow prove she used this money specifically for her needs and none of it went to you and/or shared needs. That is very, very hard to do. I feel your pain though because my mom did the same to me. She would like use my social security to pay for her gas, cat food, and other things.

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  • 8 years ago

    I see this all the time on credit reports and it is a tough situation but she's going to cause medical bills to go unpaid. You may want to confront her and see why she did this and if she's going to pay you back. If not, the only way you can get paid is by pressing those fraud charges.

    Good luck!

  • 8 years ago

    You have to prove she commited fraud first. As others have said she's allowed to use the money for your living expenses.

  • Anonymous
    8 years ago

    Don't tell her so she doesn't have time to prepare excuses. Then prepare a case against her. Then when it's done, ask her about it and then descide if you want to press charges. If so, then your case is ready! I'm sorry about that btw. I hope everything works out for the best.

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