Am I gay? Please help!?
To start of, here is some information about myself. I'm 13 years old, male, have a lot of friends and a girlfriend of 2 months. I'm also further in puberty than most of my friends. I already have a lot of body hair. (I have arm hair, leg hair, pubes, mustache, and am just starting to grow chest hair). Anyway, for about a year now I have been trying to decide if I'm gay. I used to never have these thoughts but I watched gay porn once and liked it, so I kept watching it. I found out that I only liked the videos with older men, but never thought any of the 35 and younger ones were hot. I also seem to be attracted to girls (my age) and do like them. I have a very pretty girlfriend and we have been going out for almost 2 months now. We do things together and I do get turned on from her or whatever, but I never think woman over my age (even like 18) as pretty or hot. For example I think the girls in my grade are hot, but have an extreme gay crush on one of my teachers from last year. He is 34 and every time I talk to him my heart starts beating so fast. (Yes I know I can't act on it or anything cause it's illegal and he'll lose his job blah blah blah) I have been feeling sad because I just want to tell people about it for some reason. I wouldn't say I'm depressed, it isn't that intense but I just feel sad and alone sometimes. It seems like if I came out (if I was gay or bi) it would feel so much better but I don't wanna do it too fast because what if I'm not? So does it seem like I am gay or bi or could it just be puberty and hormones?
Sorry for such a long paragraph and thank you so much for any answers I get!
- Anonymous9 years agoFavorite Answer
i was in the same dilemma as you at your age.. except i like women older then me and guys my age. i also have a crush in one of my mums friends and it was really difficult for me not to act on it. i was not sure if my feelings were due to hormones or whatever.. i also really wanted to tell someone, and i did (only one very close one) and that helped, i didn't tell anyone else for a long time because i wanted to make sure. i have now come out as bi to most of my friends. But don't feel like you have to act in the same way i did.. just try not to worry about it too much, its confusing yes but just try to get used to your feelings and just go with it.. sorry if i'm rambling.
Rose xxSource(s): me <3
- Anonymous9 years ago
Even though you are maturing sexually earlier than many of your friends, your emotional maturity won't be there for several years, so try not to rush it by pinning yourself down to one category or another.
You have some crushes going on: older or younger, it doesn't matter a great deal. But by being in the throes of puberty and rampant hormones, you kinda have a reason/excuse to blame it on, IF you find that others start to question you. In other words, you're free to say: hey, I'm learning about myself.
Whilst I definitely don't advocate acting on your impulses in regards to the hot teacher (keep in mind there's probably a lot of young folks who have found him hot over the years), in reality, there are occasions where such a relationship *does* happen IRL. Often under the radar for obvious reasons, and now and again, surfacing above the parapet to get shot down... if you'll excuse the mixed metaphors.
Basically what I'm going on about is, keep exploring; keep an open mind, keep safe and use your wits; and I think you'll find you get through this okay, and in one piece, as well as at peace, with yourself.
- Anonymous9 years ago
Time will tell. During puberty your hormones are jumping around going crazy making your brain function "different". Around age 15 stuff will change and you'll find out if your gay, bi, or normal, but stay away from porn, it can ruin your life.
- Anonymous9 years ago
I don't think you are gay but possibly bi curious, ask your self this would you date a guy in real life?porn is not real life. Do you find guys of your own age attractive sexually? Just think about this I think you just have a porn induced fetish for older men.
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- ?Lv 45 years ago
You're no longer born homosexual, in order that meana you'll decide on whether or not or no longer you could love to be homosexual. There's is not a certain reply. If that is what you desire then opt for it, if no longer, then do not fear approximately it.
- 9 years ago
Hmm. You are probably bi. But when it comes to men you are only attracted to the older ones. That's it :)