I don't have any friends?

Okay I went to college with my best friend an all I have is second hand friends, my best friend has a good amount of friends whim I just piggy back off and become friends with also. My best friend started going here a year before me and this is the end of my first semester here and I haven't ONE single friend of my own. I'm like Robin and she's Batman or something I hate it, I hate the feeling.The reason hwy this is hitting me hard now is because my best friend's friend made a joke about how no one would text me anyway when I was defensive about another friend picking up my phone; that moment made me realize that I barley have any friends in general. I'm a bit of a shy insecure person so it takes me THE longest to warm up to people. I desperately want my own friends but I'm to insecure and awkward to find them any advice?

Update:

thanks Julia =)

9 Answers

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  • Anonymous
    8 years ago
    Best Answer

    :) This happened to me last year, so I hope I help

    OK. First, talk to your best-friend. If you feel shy about it, she's the one to talk to (unless she's the obnoxious 'oh, I don't care' type)

    If she's 'batman' as you put it, then look around her. Some other friends of hers must feel the same way you do about her- you can't be the only one.

    They mostly stand to the side, or huddle around, so you'll spot them.

    If not, then look around your class. It's your first year, so there must be other new people feeling the same way about making friends. Since it's college, there's a wide variety. The insecure type people are either (not trying to be stereotypical, this is experience) flocking to popular people, in a corner, or in a/the library.

    If you can't count on college, go out to town. Walk around, go to a park if there is one. Try meeting new people at clubs or activities.

    Look, I'm insecure too. My best-friend sort-of 'gave-up' on me, so I know how it feels.

    Just try your class and I bet you'll find new people.

    I hope I helped!

    A.C.

  • 8 years ago

    Well, stop being insecure and shy. You can't expect to gain friends if you have these two traits that are getting in the way. People can sense those things and may not want to bother with you as much. The message that shy people give off is that they don't want to be bothered.

    You meant that you just got with your FIRST semester. Give yourself a break, kid.You will not instantly make friends in the snap of a finger. It doesn't work that way for most people, unless you have the strings and make them react like puppets. When I was in college, I made no friends my first few semesters. It took a LOAD of time to get friends, but I just decided to start talking to people and keeping up that effort to make them aware that i am serious. Put your shyness and insecurities away. Nobody is convincing you that you can't make friends but yourself. You are your worst enemy in this case. So break out of it. There are so many kinds of people with all kinds of personalities and I know at least a handful of them can match you. Start talking to people, start getting involved in activities, be around where the biggest crowds are, raise your hand and ask and answer questions in class. That way people will notice you and get a small taste of your personality.

  • 8 years ago

    I know what you mean... I'm shy and it takes me awhile to warm up to people. However, it depends on the type of people you see/talk to, that'll bring that shyness out of you. You can still hang with your friend, but you should leave her side, walk alone, by yourself. Around the campus or anywhere, and maybe you'll find someone that you can talk to. If you dont want that whole batman and robin thing, don't associate yourself with her all the time. Do this by yourself. If yu don't know what to say compliment a person's hair/looks/clothes. This breaks the ice and allows you and the person to talk more easily. Talk about anything that relates to whatever situation you're in.

  • Anonymous
    8 years ago

    well just relax it has only been your first semester you have 3 and a half more years to make friends. Another thing that I learned is to NEVER compare yourself to your best friend, it doesn't help anyone. But anyway if you want to make friends just join clubs, volunteer, or even look for internships! You will meet plenty of new people. Also, do not revolve all of your time around your best friend because there will be no room for new friends! I hope this helps!

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  • 8 years ago

    go through some counseling, and see what your problem is about being insecure, work through your problems with a counselor. try to find something that you enjoy, for example. dancing. be around people that enjoy the same things you do. maybe people at the college just aren't on the same level as you or just don't have the same things in common, maybe try to talk more, be a little more open and use some humor. try being a little more independent, like don't always be around your one friend, maybe she views you as being too clingy.

    Maybe try giving yourself a make over. buy new clothes, new hair style, new shoes, boost your self image, which will boost your self esteem. when you start doing things for yourself, it will feel good to you that you didn't NEED anyone to be with you to accomplish whatever it was. Hope I helped:)

  • 8 years ago

    Just open yourself up personally a bit more, Robin :)

  • Anonymous
    8 years ago

    Id like to help, but i cant. but this person ^^^^ will be your friend :)

  • 8 years ago

    we all can be your friend!!!!!!!!!!:) and you'll make some trust me

  • 8 years ago

    I'll be your friend :).

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