*10 points for best answer* Complicated situation, but I REALLY need some advice PLEASE, guys or girls opinion?

Thanks in advance for taking the time to read this and give me a serious answer, I really do appreciate it.

I am a 21 year old girl (just turned 21 last month). I am falling for my best friend (a guy), but I don't know what to do. I'm not sure if he likes me in that way and I'm afraid of ruining our friendship. Plus he is 17, is that too much of an age gap? Should I at least wait until he turns 18?

To make it more complicated he also had an on again/off again gf. They've broken up numerous times, she is always mad at him, and she has cheated on him. He tends to go back to her out of habit. They were "together" again at the beginning of the summer but nobody knew other than him, her, and me. They said they are together but they rarely talk or see each other, I think it's more of a habit, but who knows? Then today I found out from a trusted mutual friend that they are officially broken up and he has "completely gotten over her", not sure how long ago that was...

His parents are like 6 years apart and mine are 4. I know his dad would be ok with it, he has said before that age doesn't matter, he doesn't at all mind us being friends, and if something happens between us someday then it happens...idk I was encouraging to hear his approval.

The the other night I found out from a group of our mutual friends that they all thought we were dating..and they were serious. They kept asking me "come on don't you like him", I denied it because I was caught off guard. But I guess it's obvious or something that we like each other even though we are NOT dating? I don't know.

We are so close, we tell each other everything. We can talk for hours without running out of things to talk about. We have a lot of the same interests and always have fun together. He always makes me laugh. We tease each other and love to joke and have fun. When my mind wanders I think about him... I'm going crazy not telling him, we always tell each other everything, but I'm afraid I might ruin our relationship if he doesn't like me like that too. A few wks ago I told a mutual friend and she said to him "So you guys are always talking bout me and my bf, what about you two?" and he just mumbled something about his gf and changed the subject.. what does this mean?

I am nervous. I don't know what to do. I tried to test the waters by saying something like "So did you know everyone [from that one group of mutual friends] thinks we're dating?", just to see his reaction? And he didn't say much, just kinda said they're crazy. I wanted to say something like.."well what do you think? What if we were?", but I chickened out.

I want to be with him so badly but don't wanna wreck our friendship. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks

1 Answer

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  • 9 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    Personally, as you get older, the age gap doesn't make a difference.

    Besides, once you date, would you really point it out? As long as you both like each other, it doesn't matter. If people judge, **** punt them.

    If you're curious on if he'd date you or not, be upfront about it. Wouldn't you hate it if he wasn't honest with you, like now? Same applies. Guys don't like it when girls hide everything, especially their feelings. Don't be embarrassed, it's better to find out then to not know what'll happen between to you. Cheers!

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