*10 points for best answer* Complicated situation, but I REALLY need some advice PLEASE, guys or girls opinion?

Thanks in advance for taking the time to read this and give me a serious answer, I really do appreciate it.

I am a 21 year old girl (just turned 21 last month). I am falling for my best friend (a guy), but I don't know what to do. I'm not sure if he likes me in that way and I'm afraid of ruining our friendship. Plus he is 17, is that too much of an age gap? Should I at least wait until he turns 18?

To make it more complicated he also had an on again/off again gf. They've broken up numerous times, she is always mad at him, and she has cheated on him. He tends to go back to her out of habit. They were "together" again at the beginning of the summer but nobody knew other than him, her, and me. They said they are together but they rarely talk or see each other, I think it's more of a habit, but who knows? Then today I found out from a trusted mutual friend that they are officially broken up and he has "completely gotten over her", not sure how long ago that was...

His parents are like 6 years apart and mine are 4. I know his dad would be ok with it, he has said before that age doesn't matter, he doesn't at all mind us being friends, and if something happens between us someday then it happens...idk I was encouraging to hear his approval.

The the other night I found out from a group of our mutual friends that they all thought we were dating..and they were serious. They kept asking me "come on don't you like him", I denied it because I was caught off guard. But I guess it's obvious or something that we like each other even though we are NOT dating? I don't know.

We are so close, we tell each other everything. We can talk for hours without running out of things to talk about. We have a lot of the same interests and always have fun together. He always makes me laugh. We tease each other and love to joke and have fun. When my mind wanders I think about him... I'm going crazy not telling him, we always tell each other everything, but I'm afraid I might ruin our relationship if he doesn't like me like that too. A few wks ago I told a mutual friend and she said to him "So you guys are always talking bout me and my bf, what about you two?" and he just mumbled something about his gf and changed the subject.. what does this mean?

I am nervous. I don't know what to do. I tried to test the waters by saying something like "So did you know everyone [from that one group of mutual friends] thinks we're dating?", just to see his reaction? And he didn't say much, just kinda said they're crazy. I wanted to say something like.."well what do you think? What if we were?", but I chickened out.

I want to be with him so badly but don't wanna wreck our friendship. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks

4 Answers

  • 9 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    Age doesn't matter at all. I am 22 and my boyfriend is 20. Anyway, I think you should talk to him about how your feeling and pretty much everything you have put on here tell him. You will never know until you ask him how he feels. You two pretty much sound like a couple anyway so why not try it. Friendship is very important to both of you but I think you should just sit him down to talk about how your feeling.

  • 9 years ago

    First, I think its best to wait until he's 18. But if you really want things to happen, tell him. Tell him exactly how you feel, even the part about you not wanting to ruin your friendship. He could feel the same but is afraid, just like you. You'll never know unless you try. I highly doubt that your friendship will be ruined, so the worst that can happen is that he doesn't feel the same, but I'm sure it wouldn't completely ruin your friendship. So, go ahead, take the risk :) good luck!

  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    I honestly would just tell him how you feel the worst he can say is no i don't like you that way or you could flirt and let him make the first move but I would deffinatly wait until he turns 18 because depending on where u live if you went out with him it may be illegal until he's 18. good luck

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  • 9 years ago

    let him know calmly that you think that u think u like him more then a friend and see where it goes from there-if its a good response, find out if he likes u-if not, back off to keep ur friendship

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