Criminal Mind asked in PetsDogs · 8 years ago

What is your opinion on people who get rid of their dog when they have a baby?

I work at a rescue and have plenty of friends with dogs, big and small, who have had babies and still cope.

Obviously if a dog is aggressive nobody would want it near their child, i accept that.

But far too many people give up dogs just because they have a baby? Well you had the dog first, did you not think at some point you may have a family? And whats wrong with both?

It just seems some people are happy to give up on their pets when their precious child comes along.

I'm posting this Q twice, in Pets and Parenting, I just wonder how the views will differ between the die hard animal lovers and the mummy brigade....

21 Answers

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  • Lizzie
    Lv 7
    8 years ago
    Best Answer

    I think they are ignorant, uncaring, cold-natured. Tossing the dog out when you get pregnant is a virtual death sentence to most dogs. Shelters are full and can't keep dogs long so they are killed. People often make as good or bad parents as they are pet owners.

    There are many books available at Dogwise online [www.dogwise.com] that tell people exactly how to "introduce" the dog and the new baby so that neither one ever gets hurt. It doesn't take much time or effort to read one book yet many dogs don't understand that the baby isn't some kind of intruder and so growl, snarl, snap (these are all warnings to stay back) at it and the next thing you know its dead at the shelter... because the owner was too dumb to read a book.

    This is one of my pet peeves and there have been too many, too late to help complaints/questions here on this very subject lately. I feel that if you aren't going to take the time to learn how to raise and train a dog right then you have no business having children. Dogs are far easier to raise. If you can't raise a dog, you'll fail as a parent.

  • 8 years ago

    I have little doubt that there ARE plenty of people, who are bored or sick of their dog, and use having a baby as a feeble excuse to get rid of it, thereby "excusing themselves of guilt".

    Not acceptable!!

    Ever!

    But people dumping their dogs in shelters for pathetic reasons, or laziness is nothing new.

    I could never imagine dumping any animal I own in a shelter.

    HOWEVER...

    We can’t always see into the future, can we?

    I think many people seemed to have missed one important point, that you wisely mentioned in your second sentence:

    "Obviously if a dog is aggressive nobody would want it near their child"

    Correct.

    I think that very sentence, implys there is a grey area in your question.

    Its not just a straight forward case of a yes or no answer.

    I doubt that any new parent who brought home their baby and found that this was a major problem, would choose to keep the dog, despite the risk to the child.

    I mean really, would you?

    This is an ENTIRELY different situation, then the one I mentioned in my opening paragraph.

    If it came down to the safety of my baby, or my dog...

    I can’t imagine I would have chosen my dog over my child.

    A horrible decision!

    And fortunately one I never had to make.

    I would think that there ARE people who have had to make this awful decision, and I would imagine it was not made quickly or easily, in many circumstances.

    We all know the terrible damage that pets can inflict on a child.

    It happens every day.

    To all those that said they would never re-home a pet because of a child,

    I ask you your opinion on this scenario?

    You dog shows UNCHARACTERISTIC and dangerous behaviour when you bring home your new baby.

    You try everything you can think of (training, time, attention, more exercise etc).

    It doesn’t help.

    You are stressed and at your wits end.

    One day there is a near miss, when someone accidentally leaves a door open and the dog comes inside...

    Your child is still a baby, the dog still had 9-10 plus years life ahead of him.

    Would you rehome that dog, that you loved and owned before you ever even considered starting a family...???

    Or make the conscience decision to risk your child’s health and possibly life over the next 10 years, because you don’t want to rehome the dog???

    I would be surprised, if anyone can say, that keeping the dog in that scenario would be an option for them.

    Yet so many jumped in both feet saying they would NEVER rehome their dog when they had a baby.

    My answer (IF I were still young enough to still have kids)…?

    I would desperately hope not to have to rehome any pet of mine.

    I could not even IMAGINE rehoming one.

    I love them all, more than I can possibly explain to anyone who does not know me.

    They are my life.

    Would I choose my baby’s safety, over my pet??

    In a heartbeat.

    My heart goes out to those who agonised over that terrible decision.

    Note:

    Everyone should have another careful read of “one trick ponys” answer.

    This time thinking a little more deeply into this thought provoking question.

  • al l
    Lv 6
    8 years ago

    I think it's entirely irresponsible and demonstrates a lack of parental planning. There are so many ways to introduce a baby to the family pet. My Rottweiler for example loves babies. He smells a blanket of each baby he meets and when his tail wags we praise him gently. Then he gets to see and smell the baby and gets praise as he does so. While I would never leave a baby unattended with him there is no reason there shouldn't be room for both. As for the added responsibility, no one is doing the dog a "favor" by dropping it off at someone's doorstep. I knew a dog at a rescue who spent eight years in a kennel. I'm sure he would have prefered a nice warm bed and some attention. People seem to forget that having a baby is a big responsibility and should involve a lot of planning and unexpected turns. If you have a desire to have kids and don't want any other responsibilities then don't get a pet. It's not rocket science. Babies cost money, time, and are work but it's a choice the person makes to bring a baby or multiples into this world. There are older siblings who try to hurt newborn babies out of jealousy. You cope with it. You don't get rid of the child. As far as unprovoked attacks, there are no such things. It's about how the dog views the situation. Does it see the baby as something hurting his owner? Does the babies cry frighten the dog? Does the baby grab the dogs ears, tail, etc? These are all provoked.

    FACT: More children die every year from child abuse and neglect than animal attacks. Does this mean we should remove parents because they are unpredictable?

    Source(s): Military Working Dog Handler and Trainer.
  • 3 years ago

    teach your dog to come when called. Use a long line, call your dog if he does not come your correction will be to pop the dog into you and praise him. Read here https://tr.im/8mL4l

    You could use a clicker. Call your dog when she comes click and treat.

    The treat has to be something your dog is nuts over. As the handler you have to be more interesting then what is across the street. Use your imagination, I have worked with dogs in the past when the owners called their dog they would turn and start walking the opposite direction then just sit down. The dog out of curiosity would come back to check on the owner. Do not chase your dog. Dogs tend to enjoy the chase game. You did not mention if your dog is bolting out of the door to get out or not. If this is the case teach your dog the wait command at the door. This means no you can not go this time. This is a problem that a lot of people have if their dogs. If you take a lot of time with your dog and are consistent with your training it will work. If your parents see that you are working hard to fix the problem and they see an improvement in your dog your chances will be better for keeping her. Also have you thought of doing 4-H with your dog?

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  • 8 years ago

    If the dog is not a problem it could possibly be post partum related. The new mom just gets overwhelmed. Or can't deal with the training it requires to make a dog be gentle around a newborn & freaks out.I am Guessing I can't really say since I am a dog trainer so its no problem here. I do know of a young couple who ended up dumping off their black lab pup because they were moving & just had a baby .

  • Ara57
    Lv 7
    8 years ago

    Babies trump dogs.

    I love dogs. I am not so crazy about babies. I did not re-home any of our dogs when our grandchildren arrived. We had a retired greyhound who was not fond of children, but the situation was very carefully supervised at all times. He was not allowed access to the new baby, and indeed did not want to be around the infant. (Sadly, Chip was old and died when our first grandchild was 7 months old.) We also had a large lab mix at the time who was carefully supervised and never showed any hostility at all. By the time our granddaughter arrived, we had added a very sweet Border Collie mix who adored both children as long as she lived. We at one time kept a stray dog, a chihuahua mix who was somewhat aggressive and snapped at our granddaughter. He went to the pound. I refuse to have a dog that will bite people when unprovoked. Some dogs simply do not like children. Sometimes socialization will help, especially when started from puppyhood. Sometimes it won't. There are good dogs and bad dogs, and I do believe many are born that way. Training, yes, of course. Proper supervision goes without saying. I am sure deciding to re-home or give up a dog is a very hard decision to make for many people, and those folks do not deserve anyone's contempt for making it. I am sure many people do not know what steps they might take until they are there. If I were overwhelmed with caring for a dog and a new baby, which one will go? If I was worried that my dog might harm my baby, which one will go?

    Babies trump dogs.

  • 8 years ago

    I reserve judgement, I kept my last dog when I had my first child.

    He was ok whilst my son was a baby (though clearly not happy), but when he was a toddler, I spent the whole day telling the toddler not to bait the dog, or the dog not to snap at the toddler.

    It got to the point where my toddler would enter the room and my dog would snap at him - he had been my baby before my first child, so he was obviously jealous.

    I took him for more walks, gave him time with just me and the dog, but this didn't help. I was even advised to see a dog trainer, but it didn't help.

    Finally, I asked my mother if she would have my dog, which she did. That way I got to see the dog still. It was very upsetting for me, as I loved my Max and he was such a soppy dog, just not with my son.

    Obviously super animal lovers will not understand but if your dog bites your child, then another, it will have to put to sleep or sent to a specialist where it may not settle. Finding someone you trust to look after your dog if you cannot have dog and child in the same house is the kind, responsible thing to do.

    Also, for those with a very active dog, who find that they are pregnant (without knowing, as I did) will not be able to devote as much time to the dog, who is perhaps (as mine was) used to 3/4 walks a day for miles, in all weathers. You can't take a baby out in that, across rough ground where you can't take a pram, in sleet/snow/rain/hail.

    I don't think people are "happy" to give up a dog, it's not an evil decision, it's what's best for the dog. Now that my boys are both old enough to treat a dog well and can walk with me whilst I walk a dog, we have another dog (as sadly, my other dog died of a heart attack). I will never leave this dog with someone else, as I will never have more children.

  • 8 years ago

    As we received a gorgeous Border Collie from a single parent who couldn't give him the 2 hours+ walkies a day that he needed (via the RSPCA), then I've no antagonism towards them at all.

    I actually met her by chance and she was besotted by him, (she was actually in tears at meeting him again). She'd had him since a 6-month pup and gave him up at aged 9.

    Passing him on wasn't a lightly made choice; she couldn't cope with a toddler, baby plus dog. Surrendering him was the RIGHT thing to do, it wasn't about "convenience" at all.

  • 8 years ago

    I think it's terrible really. So many people these days buy dogs and when the going gets tough or their situation changes they're too quick to get rid of their pet. Owning a dog is such a huge responsibility.

    People should think long and hard before getting a dog and question whether they're going to be able to provide a happy and permanent home for their pet before buying one.

  • Anonymous
    8 years ago

    I have 4 children and 2 dogs and would never of given up my dogs because of having children ,.Some people cant cope with both its to much like hard work they say .A newborn baby takes up a lot of time and i feel some cant be bothered with there dog so give it away.

    I Had a new born with my 2 dogs and he is now 2 ,it was hard work but i managed .

    Also people think the dog will turn on the baby ,so think rather than wait and see they get rid of the dog.

    It just makes me Mad the dog was there first kids come along and the dog is no longer wanted .

    Edit ..i cant believe half the Answers you take a dog on its for life no matter what comes along if you want a dog and are going to have children you should discuss this before getting a dog ,i knew what i was getting myself into and i am expecting Twins in 6 weeks i have no intention of getting rid of my dogs .I also have a house hold of other pets that i have had for years including 6 large fish tanks ,and i manage i just don't understand how people don't manage.

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