It might be this one, not sure:
La lengua asesina (1996) aka Killer Tongue
starring Doug Bradley, Melinda Clarke, Robert Englund
This horror story involves a woman hiding out with four pastel colored poodles in a desert gas station with the loot from a heist while her boy friend does prison time. A meteorite crashes near the station transforming the woman into an alien being with a gigantic voracious tongue and her poodles are transformed into four drag queens. The whole thing grows even weirder as her boy friend escapes from prison and also encounters the meteorite, as does a mute nun who is converted into a sexy drum majorette. Pursued by the prison officials who are after him, the whole group eventually come into conflict.
Ooops! You wrote that it's NOT this movie. That said, maybe you are thinking of Species (1995) in which Sil (a female alien) tries first to mate with a man she meets at a night club, but after sensing that he is diabetic, rejects and kills him by puncturing his skull with her tongue. There's also Species II (1998).