英文自傳幫我看一下

請幫我看一下 有沒有什麼問題 我就只要簡單的英文自傳而已

有沒有不順暢

然後我接這樣可以用了嗎?

英文自傳開頭要空格嗎?

  My name is Chris,I am graduate from Mingchuan University. I was born to a middle-class family, and raised in Taoyuan, Taiwan since Nov 9th,1987, and I spent most of my childhood and school years there. Whatever, I have an brother in my family.My father is a businessman and my mother is the boss of breakfast. When I was a student, I always studied hard at school. Besides texts knowledge, math is my favorite subject,whenever studying math, my heart is filled with great joy and interesting.

Moreover, I learned how to get along with friends and myself delightedly. I am an optimistic person and I like to exercise and I have many hobbies such as play basketball,swimming and sing a song, Every time I feel more tired I can do these things to keep me relaxed.

I am really enjoyed in the process of overcoming the obstacles and completing the tasks. That means i will accomplish my wish step by step.And hoping I could be the member of THE SHANGHAL COMMERCIAL & SAVINGS BANK , to be a generally staff of bank and to do the best of my ability, thanks.

Update:

感謝你的文法更正~那文藝這樣通嗎? 會很奇怪嗎?

Update 2:

一般行員 的英文阿!!!!!! 我是用YAHOO 查的拉~

Update 3:

那你可以幫我增加一些嗎???? 好煩唷~~~我沒時間用你那個

2 Answers

Rating
  • 8 years ago
    Best Answer

    My name is Chris,I graduated from Mingchuan University. I was born in a middle-class family, and grew up in Taoyuan, Taiwan. I have a brother in my family.My father is a businessman and my mother owns a breakfast store. When I was a student, I always studied hard at school. Besides texts knowledge, math is my favorite subject. Whenever I study math, my heart is filled with great joy and enthusiasm.

    Moreover, I learned how to get along with friends and myself delightedly. I am an optimistic person and I like to exercise, and have many hobbies such as playing basketball,swimming and singing a song, Every time I feel tired, I can do these things to keep me relax.

    I really enjoyed in the process of overcoming the obstacles and completing the tasks. That means I can accomplish my goals step by step.HopefuIly, I can be the member of THE SHANGHAL COMMERCIAL & SAVINGS BANK , to be a general bank staff and to do my best , thanks.

    2011-10-21 10:36:13 補充:

    老實說你的最後一句,to be a general bank staff 那句,我看不太懂。

    你想表達什麼? 我幫你改@@

    Source(s): me
  • 8 years ago

    版主這篇英文自傳建議不要拿來應徵工作唷,因為第一句英文文法就錯了啦^^!

    英文自傳是拿來展現長處的,千萬不要反而被抓到馬腳唷~~

    我看您要不要找專人幫您校正英文自傳呢?畢竟英文自傳是找工作的關鍵,千萬要確保專業性唷^^

    http://tw.myblog.yahoo.com/jw!hfdoEPifCRAk4sTZySdN...

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