Anonymous asked in Pregnancy & ParentingParenting · 9 years ago

(12 yrs old Kid) Am I am bad Parent?

Okay, to shorten this story. I am in the military and September marked my 12th year serving. I found out that I have a 12 year old daughter. I had no idea this little girl was even existed until one day I got a letter at my job saying paternity test for a kid in Texas for child support. Now I don't know anyone out that way. I took the test and come to find out she is mine like I stated. I found out who the mom was and we dated about 13 years ago. We broke up! When I came back around she never said anything to me about a kid. I saw that she had a kid and because she cheated on me I asked her was the kid mine and she could not tell me. She was having her boyfriend at the time thinking it was his. Now 12 years later coming from a different state calling me the bad guy and slandering my name. Note I have 2 other kids that I provide and spend time with when I am not deployed or while I am on vacation. Why couldn't this be civil and 2 adults handle adult business. (lol) I have to laugh at her but how can I explain that to a kid that I don't know if she want to know the truth without talking bad about her mom. I don't know what she tell this kid. Thanks for replying it you have something good to say..


Thanks ladies, I appreciate the answers.

3 Answers

  • Anonymous
    9 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    You are definitely not a bad father since you did not have any idea that she even existed. Now that you know that she is your daughter you should try to have a relationship with her and try to do it with the help of her mother. You should try to talk to her mother and explain for the sake of your daughter that it should come from both of you as a team. Good luck !!!

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  • 9 years ago

    How could you be a bad parent if you didn't even know she existed? You can be honest with your daughter without saying bad things about her mother. Just tell her the truth, your mom never told me you were my daughter. If I had known I would have been there for you. Kids aren't stupid.

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  • 9 years ago

    just tell her the truth. Her mom didnt inform you that she exsisted and if you had known you would have been there for her. I dont think you are a bad parent.

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