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Why is it the second I walk into school...?

I'm SO self conscious??

This summer I worked out and started feeling more confident about my body after being extremely self conscious and disgusted with how I looked that I starved myself for two days last year... But I felt pretty good about myself and a little more confident, and then today we had registration and it all went down the drain. I don't know why but I found myself right where I was before, comparing myself to other girls and constantly thinking about what other people thought of me, and I started thinking how fat and tall and gross I am again (5'11" and 135 lbs). I know I'm not fat I just can't help thinking this way.

And it's only when I go into school! I really have no idea why... Ideas?

6 Answers

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  • 10 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    School is a very stressful environment where teens are constantly comparing themselves to others. It is quite unfortunate, but extremely common. There are so many people around that you can't help but to think down about yourself in comparison to everyone around you. The pressure to be better than the person standing next to you is immense, especially in schools. However, it is important to remember that there is always going to be someone prettier, smarter, more athletic, or smaller than you. This is just a part of life. Even when you are 60, there are still going to be people out there stronger in certain aspects of life than yourself. You must not let it get you down again and again. Everyone is unique in their own way. As you said, you are far from fat! Don't get down on yourself. Instead think of only positive things. Force yourself to compliment three different aspects of yourself each and everyday. This will transition your mind into positive thinking. Always keep a positive attitude.

  • Anonymous
    10 years ago

    I know what you mean. Sure, you're surrounded by people just about anywhere you go; the mall, the movies, whatever. But none of them are quite like school. School is the one place where you're surrounded by 1,000 other people your age. When you go other places, there are lots of types of people, so at least in my experience, you don't feel the same need to compare yourself to them. Let's say you're in a mall food court; there are old people, little kids, married couples, young adults... basically, you're just another person in the mix and there's no need to try to stand out (or worry that you do). But in school, everyone is equal. You walk into a room and there are going to be like 15 other 16 year old (or however old you are) girls in there. Whether consciously or not, you're going to be comparing them to yourself, thinking about what they're wearing, how they're talking, who they're talking to.

    That's just what high school is. It seems kind of cruel sometimes; throwing a bunch of hormonal kids stuck at an awkward time in their lives in a building together and expecting them to coexist for the next nine months. There's pressure to fit in, look good, have friends... even if you're not to type to worry about being pretty and popular, I don't think there's a single person who doesn't have some worries about how other people think of them. And even when there's not necessarily pressure from others, people make it seem like there's pressure, so then it seems like there is, when in reality, there isn't. Even if no one calls you fat or ugly or a loser, everyone - teachers, the media, other kids - talk about all the pressures of high school so much that it seems like there's pressure where there isn't any. For instance, I've always been a little overweight. With the exception of a comment or two in kindergarten which I can genuinely say I don't care about, no one has ever made fun of me for my weight or appearance in any way. In fact, sometimes I'm surprised at the number of compliments I get on my hair, outfit, skin, whatever. But I hear so much about how "teens these days are so worried about looking good" that I feel like people SHOULD be judging me, when in reality, they're not. And if they are, they're certainly being extremely inconspicuous about it.

    So I guess, what I'm saying is, being self-conscious is inevitable, especially at this age and in a situation like school. It's natural to compare yourself to others and to feel like they're looking down on you, when in reality, they're probably so worried about themselves and self-conscious about their own appearance or personality or whatever that it's unlikely they're paying that much attention to you.

  • Anonymous
    10 years ago

    i am the same

    i feel fine at home or with my friends but at school, i feel ridiculously self conscious.

    you're obviously afraid that people are judging you. you're scared of what they're thinking about you. its fear of the unknown.. like you know they're thinking something about you but you just don't know what.

    i'd like to offer you a solution but since i'm the same, i can't.. i haven't found a solution yet. well, i know that if i change the things about myself that are causing my low self esteem, i won't feel as self conscious. but you've done that and you are most certainly not fat.. so i don't know what you can do but you just need to know alot of people feel the same.

    it's only when you're at school 'cause there's a bunch of people there your own age and they're the ones who judge people more

  • Sam
    Lv 5
    10 years ago

    Nobody cares what you look like, they are all to busy thinking about how bad they look. Youre fine.

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  • Anonymous
    10 years ago

    it's perfectly normal :) a lot of teens are self conscious

  • 10 years ago

    Two answers,nine ratings.Where is everyone?

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