If my boyfriend gets mad and calls me stupid, does that mean I'm in an abusive relationship?

When I talk to my boyfriend, and he gets mad at something really dumb he calls me stupid, and has called me mean names before, my friends say that he does verbally abuse me but I don't think he does. Can someone please help me!

Update:

he also called me a sk**k, sl*t and so forth

15 Answers

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  • 9 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    I know you may not want to face, it sweetie, but he is. These are 2 classic signs.

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  • 9 years ago

    Does he do this a lot? Or is it just when the two of you have big arguments? I think that technically yes, it is verbal abuse. But a lot of people say things they don't mean in the heat of the moment, and the main thing you can do to fix the situation is talk about it when the two of you aren't fighting. My boyfriend says similar stuff to me, and it definitely hurts and makes me upset, but I know that he doesn't mean it and will apologize later.

    Try asking him why he called you the names that he did, and what you could do next time around to help keep his temper in check so you can continue talking without it escalating into a fight. My boyfriend says that he often gets to that point because he feels like I'm not hearing anything he says and it makes him mad because he doesn't want to hurt me but he is just so frustrated. That doesn't make it ok, but it WILL help you understand where he is coming from and maybe make it happen less. Good luck!! :)

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  • Lisa
    Lv 7
    9 years ago

    I think name calling is verbally abusive, yes. Do I think it's serious verbal abuse? Well, if it never goes beyond him calling you stupid in a moment of anger, then that's tolerable. It's not great, but this is the real world and there are many many people out there who let things slip when they're mad or frustrated. If you break up with someone just for calling you stupid, you're going to be breaking up with many people. In a perfect world we wouldn't call one another names.

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  • 9 years ago

    My Boyfriend jokes with me, I don't care because I know he is joking. But if he does it when he is mad that is odd. You aren't in an abusive relationship, that is just really MEAN for him to do that...

    Perhaps you should talk to him and tell him how you feel.

    No one has the right to call you names to make you feel bad

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  • 9 years ago

    A lot of this small stuff that right now you think is like a "whatever" thing, can eventually turn into a big issue like domestic violence.. so youshould be careful and watch out for yourself.

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  • 9 years ago

    If he called you a slut i'd dumb asap

    That is downright verbally abusive

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  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    i guess verbally but i dont think thats illegal

    just tell him you dont like him being mean to you and if i were him id stop, though i wouldnt have started in the first place

    sound kinda like a prick

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  • Cora
    Lv 6
    9 years ago

    Yes, you should get a juvenile divorce and file charges so Mickey mouse can arrest him.

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  • 9 years ago

    Get out of that relationship before it escalates.

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  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    Yes you are, you should feel safe and good when you're around him, he is not being respectful with you.

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