Hailee, you leave things to our interpretation, so here's mine. You like what a guy can do to you, and it feels so good, it is addictive. You need a guy as a boyfriend for that reason. You want to act normal and share companionship, but really, when with your guy, you are ready for pleasuring. It drives your every thought and desire. So, is this fair to your new guy, doesn't he want and expect more from you. You know, maybe absolute honesty is the way to go. That involves a serious discussion with your new guy about what you like to experience and how you like being pleasured. Simply ask him if he thinks pleasing each other is a bad thing, and remind him that it takes two to tangle. You should have no restrictions on pleasuring, and if ever you try full sex, use common sense, and have protection.