Right now your life probably feels a bad but it's not as bad as other people's trust me.
i can actually relate to with the whole friends issues, but look you'll find friends that will stick with you no matter what. Trust me I know because I'm horrible when it comes to keeping a steady friendship but lately I have been able to which is a good thing :D.
Also the whole thing that you said that people think you're happy I can also relate to but hey try to be happy. Try to even fake that you're happy and you might be happy for a while. Also because I don't really have a place to hang out during lunch I've joined clubs. If I where I would try to join clubs because it's a great way to meet new people that have same interests as you. Also being in one or maybe two clubs can be a little busy but for me it's better to have something to do because I forget that I'm sad or depressed, in other words, I'm too busy to be sad or depressed.
Going to your cutting issue. I would say stop! Also try to think what your mother would think. Even if she has some problems, she is your mother and she wants to make sure you are safe. That is one of the main goals of a mom to protect her kids.
Your bulimia problem: Don't throw up just to make yourself better.
Also you need to be more positive about life! One motto I go by is "It could be worse."
Instead of thinking about any negative aspects your life, think about the good ones. Make a list and when ever you are feeling a little blue look at it. Here I'll help you get started with the list: You have a home, at least you have a parent,hey you're 14!(two more years till being 16!), (insert other).
Use a diary!!! Umm... also there are people that care about you. Even me who is a stranger cares about your well being.
Also if you say that your dad tells you that you won't be able to do anything in life, use that as motivation. Instead of thinking that he's right or becoming depressed about it, tell yourself that you will be able to do somthing. Try to prove him wrong. Plus don't you like proving someone wrong (cause I know I do)
And take care kid. No one has the right to tell you can't do something. You ARE worth something. And people do care about you
~ Love, A random stranger who cares about the well-being others. Good Luck
My own experiance and a little bit from the heart <3
· 8 years ago