Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsSingles & Dating · 9 years ago

Exchange Student .. Troubles?

I've posted this in another forum but I need opinions.

So I'm 16 and this year my family is hosting an exchange student from Japan. I study Japanese at school and so my parents *thought* it would be perfect for me to learn more about the culture first hand. But our exchange student has been less than ideal to say the least. She's 17 and quite ... wild. Our family is strict Christians and she has fought us about going to church since the beginning refuses to eat most things we cook for her, and never tried being my friend. I'll admit I'm no in the "popular" crowd at school - but I'm no weirdo either. She 1st came here way back in August and I planned many things for us to do together and beides the 1st few weeks when we wernt in school she's refused to join me in anything. My parents dont allow dating until after College in my home but just last weekend I heard a moaning sound fro her room, thinking she might be hurt I walked into her room to see her getting head from her boyfriend. I screamed "what are you doing?!" but she never even covered herself up she just told me to get out and her BF coninued. What should I do? She's only here until Mid-July but I can't keep secrets from my parents anymore. My parents are already on a thin string with her and said if she did any more they would send her back to Japan. I'm pretty much ready to pack her things myself.

3 Answers

  • 9 years ago
    Best Answer

    My husband and I have hosted 6 exchange students and I am a volunteer with YFU. Has your family discussed any of these issues with your local program representative? If not, you need to do so NOW. Exchange students and host families are expected to be tolerant of each other's religious beliefs (or lack thereof). If she put on her application that she was willing to attend Church, she needs to do so. If she stated on her application that she did not want to attend Church, I'm afraid you're stuck with that. She is also expected to immerse herself into American life. And family rules are family rules. If she's not following them, she needs to change or other arrangements for her will have to be found.

    Talk to your exchange program immediately.

  • 3 years ago

    a million. This conduct is not whatever that are meant to be of important challenge until he without doubt refuses to do the whole lot you propose, at any given time. In such a lot Asian cultures, schooling is located as a precedence (the concept of schooling=good fortune,) so he is commonly simply feeling the must preserve his priorities in form. Of path, this concept is not best observed in Asian tradition nor am I pronouncing all Asian households undertake such recommendations, but it surely'd be shrewd to take those matters into account and deliver him a vast berth. Don't attempt to drive him to do whatever useless as his best responsibilities are the ones of an alternate scholar. two. I'm now not accustomed to Korean tradition, ingesting, and so forth. however I recognise good ample that you should not press any visitor to discard his assets-- anything they is also-- if you happen to don't seem to be definite approximately the situations. This will have to be whatever to be mentioned with the dad and mom or the company, if viable, in case you have doubts. three. Again, do not press him approximately his assets. If his calls disrupt you in a first-rate approach, then you definately will have to don't forget speaking to him approximately it. Otherwise, do not take useless movements-- in spite of everything, he is in a international nation, clear of loved ones and every body else he is ever identified; widespread calls will have to be anticipated. I realise how you do not wish this to be a spoiled revel in to your son, and your issues are comprehensible the least bit. However, it is major to do not forget every of your responsibilities on this trouble: he is an alternate scholar and you are the host. Good success! Don't disregard to have a laugh as a number :)

  • 9 years ago

    Well, you can't force her into following the rules of your religion, that's not right or possible. However, she should be more respectful of you and your family in the sense that you are giving her such an amazing opportunity and she is taking you for granted. Have you tried talking to her? Tell her exactly what you've written here, about how you and your parents are fed up of her acting inappropriately and rudely, and that if she continues, you will send her back to japan.

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