Are parents of this generation going to be forced to be more "upfront" with their kids about their past?

The other day I was reflecting on some things...thinking about my future..etc.......and I got to thinking about the type of parent I'll someday be.

So I got to thinking that I'd like to be a parent who expects great things out of their kids, but at the same time (mainly when they are older), tell them about mistakes I made along the way, and the reprecussions of whatever those mistakes may have been. As an example (and this part doesn't apply to me, personally, as I can honestly say I've never done drugs).....imagine a dad screaming about his son for using pot, when he himself used to smoke it regularly. Is that more effective than the dad explaining the reasons he QUIT smoking pot (the illegal nature of it, maybe it made him more lazy? whatever may have happened) and why his son shouldn't?...

So from there, my mind branched out even further, and I got to thinking about all the young adults today who's "escapades" end up on Youtube, Twitter, Facebook, etc. Who knows how long that info will be readily available online.....but it seems to me like in today's world we are under a microscope 24/7, moreso than we were even 10 years ago..

Kids are definitely going to be far more able to see what mommy and daddy were up to back in the day, more than they previously could..

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  • 9 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    which is exactly why i have my facebook on lockdown- and nothing goes online that i wouldn't show my grandma.

  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    I'm not a parent, however I still think there has to be some kind of middle-ground between telling your kids about your past mistakes vs. not telling them and being a parent.

    There are some people who honestly believe that they are being hypocritical if they tell their kids not to do something that they did themselves as kids. I know someone just like this, and as you can imagine, her kids are jerks who completely disrespect her all because she's too afraid of being a "hypocrite."

    My father, for example, used to smoke a lot of pot back in the day. Problem is, I also smoked pot as a teenager. If my dad told me "look, I used to pull the same crap blah blah blah" then I would not have taken him seriously, but since I didn't know that at the time I saw him as my father and not some guy who used to get high all the time.

  • 9 years ago

    Thoughtful and well written. I guess the best answer I can give you is to point out that throughout the history of mankind every generation has tried to prevent their offspring making the same stupid mistakes they did, but without success since kids of every generation seem to come out of the womb convinced they are much wiser and so vastly more enlightened than their elders. I suppose that's just the nature of the beast.

    t

  • Mrbill
    Lv 7
    9 years ago

    not sure if this is correct, criminal records and such will come up any way. Not sure about the fact book people. How great will it be for the mother to find her postures and statements she made at age 13 or so.

    I hope things change and people get older before having kids. Too many kids raising kids. Does not work in human life or the wild.

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  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    I was already in my mid 30's when Facebook was created so my son is going to need an analog way-back machine to spy on my youthful indiscretions. But he won't need that since I'm going to be honest about my past. And if I found him smoking pot I'd talk to him instead of screaming.

  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    Even as a teenager I was pretty straight-laced, so I never did drugs or went out partying. But there were times when I wished my parents told me more about their pasts, like their dating experiences, when it came to things like giving me relationship advice. If my son ever asks me about what I did when I was younger, I would tell him because I don't have anything to hide.

  • Bonini
    Lv 6
    9 years ago

    I think there is a certain level of filtering you need to do depending on the age of your kids, but honestly is never a bad thing, If they could learn from either one of my mistakes that would be a win.

  • 9 years ago

    Yes, and that should be a great thing IMHO. That will teach people to think twice before they do something they might regret. And I don't mean they should be social conformist and don't do any crazy things. I did crazy thing in my past but I don't regret doing them and certainly wont mind my son knowing about them.

  • ?
    Lv 5
    9 years ago

    don't forget the sh*tstorm brewing behind the vcr tapes saved from Jerry springer, maury, ricki lake, and dr phil, the exotic dancers, blah blah blah

  • 9 years ago

    I think my kids have already figured out that I was (and still am) a goofball and sort of nerdy.

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