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parents co sleeping with older kids?

I just have a few questions so

Did you choose to co-sleep or are you just tolerating a child who refuses to sleep on their own bed?

At what age did they finally go to their own bed and was it their decision or something you forced upon them?

My daughter has slept with us on and off her entire life. She went thru a good 6 mos going to her own bed and sleeping there the entire night. The last 6 mos though she has flat out refused to be in her bed and will only go to sleep in our bed. I sometimes carry her back to her bed after she falls asleep but most nights she comes back screaming bloody murder few h later. Shell be 4 soon btw.

I'm not going to fight with her over it but I am kinda looking forward getting my bed back at somepoint..

11 Answers

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  • kanga
    Lv 4
    9 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    My son will be 5 in July. He still sleeps with us sometimes, although hes been getting a lot better with it. We didnt really mind, and didnt push it until his last growth spurt. Now the 3 of us just cant sleep comfortably together (Hes a kicker). I enjoy cuddling up with my fiance at night, and when our little one is in there, we can't do that because our son is in the middle . Sometimes though, I really enjoy cuddling up with my son all night. Hes made a lot of progress with sleeping in his own bed.

    I have a cousin, who is 20 years old and in college.... She still sleeps in her parents bed, in the middle. I don't think thats healthy.... I think its important to get your little one into her bed before shes 20 lol, but I dont think shes too old to be going through this. I think shes probably right where my son was at that age. Eventually, she'll be more receptive to sleeping in her own bed, and when she is, read her a book or something every night. Some kind of bedtime routine really helps! Good luck!

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  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    My son co-slept in our room, not our bed (he was a preemie and didn't feel it was safe to have him in our bed) until just recently, it's been nearly a month that he has been in his own room and he is still coming into our room about 2 times a night. I take him back to his room and get him to go back to sleep, but he is good about it and doesn't cry or scream or anything.

    I only moved him into his own room once I knew he was ready and would give us the best chance at succeeding, and he is coming into our room less and less (it was more like 5 or more times a night most nights at first, and 2 being down to 2, sometimes 3 times a night is good.

    My son is 5 years old.

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  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    Hi, I have experience. My 8 year old son has been doing the same thing since he was around 4 1/2. I have also wanted my bed back to myself. LOL, he will occasionally sleep in his bed. The other day he asked me if he could get a cool new bed. I told him he can't until he starts sleeping in his own bed. So that helped a little. Maybe if you try to bribe her. Like if she starts sleeping in her bed she can earn a toy or something. When my son was around 5 years we started to give him a little hot wheels car overtime he slept a whole night in his bed. When he slept a whole week in his bed, he earned something else a little bigger. Try bribing them by a toy they are really into, like if she's a girl maybe a barbie, or my little pony, or for a boy, star wars, hot wheels cars etc. So I understand how you feel.

    Hope all goes well!

    Source(s): From Experience.
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  • 123
    Lv 7
    9 years ago

    we chose to and still are choosing to :)

    mine is newly 2 -- he still nurses. I'm not going to push it now because it's not the right time. when he or I or my husband gets sick of it then I think that'll be a good time to do the transition. he has his own room and his own bed when he's ready for them. I've found that the pushier and more anxious I get about something, the more mine pushes back and it ends up taking 2 times as long than it would have if I just let it ride out. I have zero expectations when it comes to sleeping through, weaning, and when he'll stop co-sleeping so that makes everything (well, almost) that we've been through seem normal.

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  • 9 years ago

    I am a single widowed mommy with a 4 year old son. My husband/his father died in an auto accident when he was 3 months old. When my 4 year old (just turning 3 at the time) and I moved out of my parents bunk house I bought my own 1 bed and 1 bath house. Eversince we have co-slept and haven't changed since. He still sleeps with me and we are very comfortable with it. If so, I'll let him sleep with me until he is 10 or 12 if that is what he wants.

    kanga, I strongly agree with you that 20 year old who still sleeps in the middle with her parents is UNHEALTHY and extordinarilly weird. I can't see anyone (that I know of) doing that.

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  • My oldest co-slept from birth. It was a special time, mommy and baby got to snuggle at bed time and eventually she'd get moved to her own bed at night. She is 3 now and sleeps on her own just fine, she never tries to come to our bed at night, even if she is scared or had a bad dream... we let her fall asleep in our bed sometimes when we are not there if she wants, but she has outgrown co-sleeping and likes her own bed now.

    I've taken a few naps with my younger daughter but I have no desire to have another kid in our bed. I will share at nap time but at night I need some space now.

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  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    Mine slept with us until she turned 3. We bought her a new big girl bed and she'd go to bed in it. In the last year, she's slept in our bed many times though. She'll wake up in the middle of the night, hear a noise, get scared and I let her get in bed. She'll have a month where she stays in her own bed every night, then a month where she ends up in our bed every night.

    She'll be 4 in a few weeks, and this week she's said she is going to be a big girl and stay in her bed.

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  • ?
    Lv 5
    9 years ago

    My LO is 2.5 and still cosleepsby choice. She had a crib by the bed and only part time coslept, spent most of the time in her crib until she got sick at almost a year old and then has been in the bed ever since. No big hurry to send her off but, when she is ready she will go.

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  • Our son is 3 and someitmes will sleep with us in our bed. We all enjoy the extra family time, but he sleeps just as well in his own bed. Some nights i just really miss him lol and ask if he wants to sleep in his bed or 'mommy and daddy's bed' so i give him the option.

    However, we are very lucky that he is just as happy to sleep in his own bed and will sleep there all night because we have a baby girl due in June.

    Source(s): Jenn
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  • dynah
    Lv 4
    4 years ago

    My 4 year previous co-slept with me for the first 3 or 4 months because he became untimely. My 2d son became untimely even more suitable and became 3lbs. after I took him domicile from the NICU he became basically 3lbs 9oz and soooo tiny! i became petrified of him being contained in the bassinet on my own and he also became nursing and everynight he were given evening fussiness truly undesirable! He ought to scream and scream at about 8:30/9:30 pm until eventually he became in mattress with me and nursing. Now, he's 10 months and it is basically a lot less annoying. My husband is deployed and so there is not any huge rush, besides the actual undeniable truth that i'd like the gap in my mattress back! i trust bonded to him nonetheless and considering the fact that my husband is lengthy gone, i trust like i pick "someone" there. i pick that bond. I do infant him plenty because he became so tiny and we merely about lost him. It became complicated before my husband left because he ought to whinge after I breastfed that the newborn were given more suitable interest then he did and considering the fact that my son nursed each and every hour, we had a small window to have a love lifestyles before he got here into our mattress at 8:30/9:30 and stayed there. It became truly complicated for us yet attainable! I plan on weaning him quickly because i'd be weaning him off the breast and he needs to commence drowsing in his crib.

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