Anonymous asked in 社會與文化語言 · 10 years ago

如果男生問「Do you want to spend...」

請問一下,如果男生問妳「Do you want to spend the night with me?」

Does it mean anything about sex?

'Couse I just replied to a guy with "I'd love to. But I think you are tired. You should go to bed."



「Which means... Do you want to spend the night with me?」

所以才會回他「I'd love to.」


If I had known that sometimes it means something about sex, I wouldn't say that...



Actually he did ask me out. And that happened while he was driving me home.

Update 2:

Well... I did want to "spend the night" with him. BUT not in bed!! He looked like a gentleman, and acted like a gentleman. But that offer made me cheap.

Update 3:

We are in Aus.

Update 4:

He asked me out.

And before we ended up in his car, we were chatting and drinking in his friend's house with some of his other friends.

Update 5:

He made the offer in a low voice, and looked at me at the same time.

Does it sound romantic?!

I don't know... I think the problem for me was that we were not in a relationship yet...

It was just the second time we met each other...

Update 6:

「Your reply:"I'd love to. But I think you are tired. You should go to bed." basically meant not tonight but okay next time.」、「I think he will think you are not very but quite easy.」

Well... That's why I asked this question.

Update 7:

I don't want to send him the wrong message.

But obviously, I DID. Didn't I!!

Damn!! Maybe I should learn some French.

5 Answers

  • 10 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    It's very difficult to judge. I don't know how well you know him. If you know him quite well, then it would be a friendly invitation. If you just met him, then I would say it could mean sex. Either way, it all depends on his intention and your own interpretation. If you don't want to stay over, then don't say 'I'd love to' as it will send the wrong message across and he will just keep inviting you to spend nights together.

    My interpretation on "I'd love to. But I think you are tired. You should go to bed." is You don't want tonight, but may be in the future we can spend nights together.

    If you like him very much, then it's okay to say I'd love to, but just not right now. And of course as the relationship develops, he will invite you again. Saying I would love to, won't not make you look easy - 隨便 - the word for 隨便 in English is easy. You did imply that I don't desire to spend the night with you at this moment.

    If this is not what you want, and you want to be polite at the same time, then say "It's okay. I think you are tired. You should go to bed." - This will give him a firm and polite rejection.

    My Boyfriend asked me to spend the night at his house.?


    2011-03-05 21:52:49 補充:

    He asked you out and also asked you to spend nights with him meant that he wants you very much. In this sense, he clearly meant sex.

    2011-03-05 22:46:44 補充:

    It's still very difficult for us to judge his intention. Gentlemen have the right to ask for sex. Ladies have the right to say no. Gentlemen are still men at the end of the day. They are just not chavs.

    2011-03-05 22:47:00 補充:

    Even if you accepted his invitation and spent the night at his house wouldn't make you look easy or cheap. You have the right to say "you don't want to sleep with him".

    2011-03-05 22:49:27 補充:

    Do you want to spend the night with me? can mean a lot of things. Having sex is of course one of the activities. It's you who need to tell him that this option is not available.

    2011-03-05 23:18:12 補充:

    Her situation with the Frenchman is very tricky. i would say it's about sex at the end of the day. I would be surprised if that Frenchman is disinterested in sex.

    2011-03-05 23:29:56 補充:

    Perhaps she should write another article for The Gazatte and the title would be "Relationship: Culture Shock". xD

    2011-03-05 23:35:50 補充:

    She said he acted like one. So in a way you can say that there is no gentlemanness in him.

    2011-03-06 09:38:45 補充:

    In this case, I think it's the one who is asking the question is experiencing some culture shock rather than the Frenchman who is being naive about other culture. It would not suprise me to hear men asking girls to spend nights with them outside Taiwan.

    2011-03-06 10:25:05 補充:


    2011-03-06 10:33:48 補充:

    Your reply:"I'd love to. But I think you are tired. You should go to bed." basically meant not tonight but okay next time. Yes, for him he is going to think he will score next time.

    2011-03-06 10:33:56 補充:

    I think he will think you are not very but quite easy. Just met twice and not in a relationship and drinking and then asking to spend nights - that's not romantic. He was definitely looking for sex.

    2011-03-06 10:38:52 補充:

    He wants SEX

    2011-03-06 10:48:04 補充:

    Yes, well done for realising the fact.

    2011-03-06 11:21:45 補充:


    語言+人+社交經驗 = 知識

  • 10 years ago

    if he really likes you he wouldn't care if that offer made you cheap, but you need to have second thought on whether he's a gentleman like you said, because if he is, then he wouldn't even ask that question before you two go on to the next level...

  • 10 years ago

    If this French guy is a good friend of yours, as well as you know this guy very well, he probably meant that two of you could spend time watching movies or do something else. He could probably be in a bad mood or something, and he just needed someone to talk to or to chill out.

    2011-03-05 20:17:46 補充:

    However, if you just met this guy, or if you are not famaliar with him, he probably just tried to give you a booty call and waited to see what you responded. Usually a guy would ask a girl out in the first place if he likes her, rather than asking her to spend the night with him.

    2011-03-05 22:20:42 補充:

    He seems pretty aggressive. I'm not sure if he's a aggressive person or he's a player. If you likes him very much and he's not a player, you can tell him to slow down. If you only see him as a friend or he's just a player, then you don't really need to give a damn about him.

  • 10 years ago

    LOL! Com'on...

    Do you want to spend the night with me == come sleep with me

    == let's have sex tonight.

    All men are pigs! and it is true...

    2011-03-05 21:05:34 補充:

    Wow, this guy wants to score a home run on the first date?

    You had better watch out, girl...

    None should be so horny, except for those in Daytona beaches next week.

    2011-03-05 21:08:07 補充:

    But, hey, girl - I really meant it. There is --10% (I mean negative 10%) chance that they want to watch a movie or walk on the beach through the night with you, when they uttered those words.

    2011-03-05 21:11:47 補充:

    Or, if he is really single, and you really like him, or if he is Zuckerberg, then go ahead and make his day.

    2011-03-05 23:10:06 補充:

    Dude, you don't need to see the bed(s) to know what he wants.

    He just wants to get laid.

    2011-03-05 23:23:25 補充:

    Well, I noticed a little culture shock here. Seriously, where are you guys located? Are you in Taiwan or in the States?

    If in Taiwan, I think he needs to prepare to be more sensitive on relationship.

    If in US, I think you need to relax a little.

    OMG, when did I become my grandma? (Sorry, Granny)

    2011-03-05 23:31:26 補充:

    I don't think a gentleman will attempt to score a home run on the first date; even on US standard, it is way too slutty to do that on the first date. Well, maybe first base, but nothing beyond that...

    2011-03-05 23:46:24 補充:

    All of my ex-BF acted like one as well but all turned out to be SoB eventually.

    2011-03-06 10:16:57 補充:

    Well, well, well, I think Aussies are typically more liberal than Americans. Yes, indeed, our princess is in culture shock.

    Go for it, your highness. If not him, who? If not now, when? But only if he is what you like...

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  • 10 years ago

    Hilarious, but perfectly illustrates the expression "biting off more than you can chew."

    2011-03-06 08:26:42 補充:

    Go for it! If he doesn't respect you in the morning, just tell him you faked your orgasm.

    2011-03-06 11:51:11 補充:

    "Damn!! Maybe I should learn some French"

    Nah! You don't need to know the language as long as you know how to kiss that way.

    2011-03-06 11:53:27 補充:

    "He wants SEX"

    Now don't go jumping to conclusions here!

    He may very well be looking for intellectual stimulation.

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