Any doctors or ex amphetamine users? I need some advice?

Last december, I overdosed on adderall and had a heart attack. I had been using for a couple years, quite frequently. but the night I overdosed was at the end of a week long binge where I hadnt eaten or slept in days..and probably did about 1,000 mgs collectively the whole week. The night I overdosed I snorted a... show more Last december, I overdosed on adderall and had a heart attack. I had been using for a couple years, quite frequently. but the night I overdosed was at the end of a week long binge where I hadnt eaten or slept in days..and probably did about 1,000 mgs collectively the whole week. The night I overdosed I snorted a mix of time release and blues...and was more speedy than ever before. Later that night my heart rose to 165 bpm, and I called an ambulance.
When I went to the hospital they gave me four doses of ativan to bring my heart rate down..but it mixed with the adderall and made me hallucinate really badly. I thought that the hospital had kidnapped me and was doing experiments on me...and I would black out where it felt like I was asleep but was really just staring at the wall. I couldnt remember my name or recognize my mother.

Since then, I have talked to my psychiatrist who said that I probably did some damage to my brain with such a high amount of drugs, and that I'm lucky to still be walking. because of this experience I have severe ptsd and wont ever touch the stuff again, or any drug..because im so afraid of them.

My question is, now when I work out, my heart rate spikes to like 140 even when I'm just walking briskly. I get shaky and have psychosis like symptoms when I drink caffeine. and sometimes I have them without caffeine or anything.

I'm wondering if,
-Its all in my head because I am traumatized, and that I make my bpm spike cuz im scared?
-I did such severe damage that I wont go back to normal?
and finally, is it safe for me to have caffeine or alcohol? I'm afraid that if I drink it will effect my heart negatively.
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