Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Social SciencePsychology · 9 years ago

How to love yourself so others will love you?

I know that looks can make things exciting in a relationship but there are certain things that are more important in a relationship. In my Communications class I learned that Beauty and Attraction are two different things. Beauty is something that you are born with but if you do not have the right personality its useless. Attraction is something that makes a person stand out. They can be ugly but there is something special that makes them attractive. I don't think I was born with good looks but how can I love myself so I can make myself attractive.

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  • ?
    Lv 5
    9 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    It is true that if you hate yourself, no one is going to love you. Also, a person who cannot love him or herself, cannot love anyone else either.

    But know this, every child is born with tremendous love for himself. It is the society, the parents, the environment in which they are born that destroy that love. The child's love for him or herself has to be distracted. He or she have to be conditioned so that their love is always towards an object outside himself, which is never true love.

    But learning to love oneself is not difficult, it is natural. If you have been able to do something which is unnatural, if you have learned how to hate others without loving yourself, then the other thing is very simple. You have done the almost impossible. It is only a question of understanding, a simple understanding, that "I am to love myself; otherwise I will miss the meaning of life. I will never grow up, I will simply grow old. I will not have any individuality. I will not be truly human, dignified, integrated."

    Your first responsibility is towards yourself. And just see: if everybody is loving themselves, caring about themselves, their intelligence will come to its peak, their love will be overflowing. You will have so much to share, so much to give, that giving will become a joy to you, that sharing will be a celebration to you. Altruism can only be a by-product of self-love. Because you don't love yourself, you feel weak -- because love is nourishment, it is your strength.

    But in order to love yourself, first you have to know yourself. You have to look deep into yourself, and only then you will be able to discover the treasures within. When that happens, when you can look within and feel the source of your life and beauty and love, everything on the outside will not even matter anymore. To look inside yourself, you need to learn to meditate, because that is the only way to enter deep into your being. Once you do that, no effort is required, love will naturally arise from within.

    If you would like to learn to meditate, it can be a little difficult for beginners, but once you get the knack of it, you are in for a great surprise. It can transform you. It has been scientifically proven to increase happiness, compassion and awareness. It will make you clear thinking, lucid, calm and loving. You will be again innocent and pure. In other words, you will be yourself again.

    Email me if you are interested of learning more about how to meditate and where to start. I will be more than happy to help you and share the love that I have already found inside :)

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  • 9 years ago

    By not concentrating on trying to get people to like you. Just be more situationally aware, act accordingly, but in a way that exudes subtle confidence just by being yourself. If you try to make use of loving yourself first as a means to the end (of others loving you) you won't get anywhere. So here's the thing - don't bother about others too much, and accept the way you are, and be comfortable around yourself.

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  • Anonymous
    3 years ago

    1

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  • 4 years ago

    Secrets To Getting Ex Back : http://ExBack.GoNaturallyCured.com

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  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    You don't love yourself to get love from others, you love yourself because you have respect for yourself and confidence. These things are very important to have. People will respect you because you have confidence. There is no one that can love you better.

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  • M40
    Lv 4
    9 years ago

    I knew a guy once who was really ugly but he always had lots of friends and lots of girlfriends. The reason is that he was very smart and very confident and very funny. People can see past looks, and eventually your personality will shine through.

    Best of luck!

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  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    I think it's about loving yourself enough to both be confident about yourself while actively trying to improve yourself. If you loved yourself, it should mean that you'd try to do what's best for you. So that could include things like reading or learning to be more worldy, intelligent, and interesting, working out to be more fit (increasing physical attractiveness), going out more to work on social skills and just to have fun...etc etc. For some, confidence is natural, but for some, it's something that needs to be worked at. Remind yourself of your successes (whether it be in school, work, personal, or social realms), and use them to strengthen your confidence and motivate you to achieve more. Doing (reasonable) things that makes you happy is good too - not only is it good for yourself and your well-being, but others usually enjoy being around happy people more. Be good to yourself, but I don't mean be over-indulgent and do whatever the hell you want, but do things that are good for you. Remember, looks can only go so far once you get to know a person, but it's the personality or the connection that KEEPS someone interested. I've joked a few times that a hot person who's boring/messed up on the inside is just a waste of pretty face/body =P.

    Source(s): Personal life, psychology BA, experience in work and with clients, dumping/rejecting people who are hot but don't have much else going on for them =P.
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  • 4 years ago

    My Ex Back Success Story : http://ExBack.GoNaturallyCured.com

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  • 9 years ago

    Smile and exude positive energy. Everyone will love you, trust me.

    Always always think positively.

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  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    I DONT CARE END THE WORLD FOREVER GOD END IT GOD END IT GOD END IT GOD END IT GOD ENDIT ALL GOD END ALLOF OHIO GOD END ALL OF AMERICA GOD END THE WHOLE WORLD FOREVER GOD......END IT ALL JESUS END IT ALL JESUS END IT ALL JESUS END IT ALL JESUS END EVERYTHING JESUS END IT JESUS END IT JESUS

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