What could cause my car's electrical sytem to not work at all unless the key is on?

i have a 08 eclipse spyder and it appears as though everything that runs off a constant 12v is dead. hazard light, the dinging sound when the door is open, interior lights, cig lighter, power locks, even the keyless entry and alarm. but once the key is in the on position almost everything works fine other than the... show more i have a 08 eclipse spyder and it appears as though everything that runs off a constant 12v is dead. hazard light, the dinging sound when the door is open, interior lights, cig lighter, power locks, even the keyless entry and alarm. but once the key is in the on position almost everything works fine other than the stuff that i can tell still needs the constant 12v line, radio, inside lights. the locks work fine, the headlights, windows. but once i turn the key back off its dead again. i dont even get the delay from the headlights that keep them on until you get out, or the window timer delay to roll them back up. i checked the fuses and they are all fine, that stuff isnt even all on the same fuse or group of fuses anyway. what could this be?
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