Is their like a age limit for sitting on Santa Clauses lap at the mall?

I was wandering if theirs like a age limit for sitting on Santa Clauses lap at the mall. I'm 14, do you think I would be aloud? I have a HILARIOUS idea. I'm going to take a whole bunch of laxatives an when I sit on his lap I'll say "I want like 50,000 rolls of toilet paper for Xmas" an... show more I was wandering if theirs like a age limit for sitting on Santa Clauses lap at the mall. I'm 14, do you think I would be aloud? I have a HILARIOUS idea. I'm going to take a whole bunch of laxatives an when I sit on his lap I'll say "I want like 50,000 rolls of toilet paper for Xmas" an he'll say "why do you want toilet paper" an I'll say "FOR THIS!!!!" An I'll like lift my leg up and crap diarrhea all over Santa an myself!!! It will be the funniest thing EVER!!!! And I have even thought of like sticking my finger down my throat so I can barf all over him too!!!! Everyone would die laughing!!!!!
Update: It made me laugh too KW it wood be HILARIOUS an everyone would be laughing an I would be FAMOUS!!!!
Update 2: What's a lap dance?
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