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Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsMarriage & Divorce · 10 years ago

Non-Custodial parent visitation for out of state moves?

I have sole physical custody of my 4 yr old son. His dad and I share legal custody. His dad currently pays $68 per week in child support which is not enough considering daycare is 200 per week, etc...Anyway, I sat down and talked to him rather than running to court to find out what his financial situation is, you know..Basically he is just going to school, which is good, but I think he should work a little more too.....Anyway, since I work for a company that is nationwide, I was considering moving to a suburb in Georgia. The houses are really cheap. i was considering buying a home around 60,000..My mortgage would be very low considering that I pay $1300 for a 2 bedroom in MA now. ..Also, the schools in the area are really good, whereas the town I live now, requires me to place my son in a private school because the public schools are not that great..........Now his dad currently sees him every other Friday at 8 pm to Sunday at 6 pm. My move is not to deprive my son from his dad. I want to create a visitation schedule, but I am not sure what the average schedule is for ut of state moves? Suggestions anybody???? My only concern is: If my son comes up here for the summer, can I request at court that he has to be enrolled in a summer program? His dad is the type to leave him with anyone so he does not have to pay.....I mean I am not trying to nag, I just want to know that my son is okay while he is up here. Isnt that fair enough?.Any suggesstions for visitation?

Most importantly, I would like for my son to maintain the relationship he has with his dad, but I can't afford the cost of living in MA...At least if I moved to Georgia, I can cut my hours down to 30 and finish school! Also my son will have a backyard and be happy. (I'm one of those ppl who make too much to qualify for assistance, but can't afford the cost of living after taxes)

Also..his dad has never been to a doctor's appt, dentist appt, or even a school open house.....I always let him know a month in advance even though I know he won't go, so how will he do this if I leave my son with him?

4 hours ago

Update:

ok let me just clarify..i'm aware that i have to go to court first to get permission to move out of the state.....im just stating the facts and asking if anyone knows what the average out of visitation parenting plan would be like for this type of person who is around when they feel like it, but does have rights like every father does!!

4 Answers

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  • AZD²
    Lv 7
    10 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    You can leave without his permisson but you have to get the courts permission to do it. If there is something in your decree that says you can't you have to go back to court even if he says it's ok to amend your decree. If you do it just by getting his permission make sure he signs a document drafted by your lawyer.

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  • Gary B
    Lv 7
    10 years ago

    Part One:

    This is Your EX husband. When you signed the divorce papers, you TOTALLY gave up any right or claim on his life. You can no longer tell him what he "has" to do. You can't tell him when he needs to work, where he needs to live, or where he has to be at any specific time.

    you need to take ALL this talk out of any further discussions -- ESPECIALLY with your lawyer. You get this into things and the court will see you as a controlling b----, and is likely to SEVERELY limit your options.

    Part Two:

    Make sure that you have a written permission from THE COURT before you move. in many states, parents are not allowed to move more than 50 or 100 miles without court permission. This is ESPECIALLY true with Joint Legal Custody. Doesn't matter what you INTEND do to, what matters is what the result IS.

    You are likely to have a tough time, seeing as how your company has several offices, but the move is YOUR idea, not theirs. if they were to close your local office and offer you a job in GA, that would be different.

    CALL YOUR LAWYER NOW! Don't plan anything until you have found out what your AND your ex'es legal right are.

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  • 10 years ago

    I think your reasons for moving see very valid and all the dad has to do is step up and provide if he really wants his son in the same town. Or at least work with you, figure out a compromise. It sounds like he does the bare minimum so of course you have to pick up the slack. No one is stopping him from moving too. I lived in Georgia and my father lived in California. I spent summers with him and when I got older he often chose to come to Georgia if I had activities going on. It happens. Holidays were rotated. I would expect the courts will assist you in developing a visitation plan. But you have to understand and be ready to give up Christmas and holidays. It can’t all be your way. And you cannot control what he does with the kid during his visitation. The courts will tell you that. You chose to have a child with this guy so you have to accept the father that he is. You have to relinquish control.

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  • 10 years ago

    This is probably something that could have been brought up while you two were divorcing. When my ex and I divorced we had already come up with a visitation schedule. I was moving out of state. He gets him for most of the summer and half of any school breaks during the year. Good luck.

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