✾ This is an excellent question! Several times I thought this matter and I would say that is an issue which moves the philosophy.
Love is a feeling of giving oneself to another, but always respecting the limits of everything. Love is that feeling where you're somewhat detached from the person. You love her just when she cares and wants to be on her side, but knows that if it fails, it does not matter because the main love is to see the beloved happy, albeit with another. I know it's kind of unrealistic to say this, but the reality is that nobody really loves ... Because what we call "love" is an egocentric feeling only "you" matter, just your feeling, and your fantasy of what that person is your prince or princess enchanted blue. I would say that our conception of love is very distorted. True love seeks the happiness of another person. We should be happy because we love is happy.
But unfortunately this is not what happens ... Many people confuse love with obsession. Then it comes to obsession ... When we can not be alone or individual, always when we need each other to live our lives. And that's too bad! Imagine ... You are always in the shadow of someone else for everything ... Unable to be 1, needing to always be second to complete. I am in favor of independence. The greater the independence of the person in relation to his love, the greater your love.
When we want that person just for us, no matter the consequences or the misfortune of that (getting back to this "ego"), it becomes an obsession, which in the end it will not even good for us ...
Anyway ... One issue on which I speak here for hours and hours ... I would say that love leads to the independence of being happy with the happiness of another. The obsession leads to our dependence only be happy when we get everything just for us, which could be called selfishness.
I'm sorry I took so long! And I hope I have answered your question!