My husband and I fight all the time over him not helping with the baby...?

He is also working a pretty crappy schedule. He barely gets any sleep, so at night, I take care of the baby because I feel bad for him. He also sleeps a lot on his off time and I used to get mad, but now I'm just used to it. I know it's not really his fault. But today, for instance, he came home, was... show more He is also working a pretty crappy schedule. He barely gets any sleep, so at night, I take care of the baby because I feel bad for him. He also sleeps a lot on his off time and I used to get mad, but now I'm just used to it. I know it's not really his fault.

But today, for instance, he came home, was wide awake and played his drums for about an hour and was fine. During the time he got home to when he layed down on the couch, I changed 3 diapers and fed him 3 times, got up when he cried, held him and played with him. Keep in mind, I have things to do as well. I am a photographer and I have a lot of editing and time that needs spent on the computer. I also like to work out and do my hair and make up, but seems lately I can't even do that. On top of all of that, I try to clean and cook as much as I can, and I am exhausted.

I HAVE TRIED explaining this to my husband...all he does is put up his defense and gets so mad he slams his had on the wall or whatever is in front of him and cusses at me. He doesn't think he does anything wrong. And when I try to bring things up to him (not yelling whatsoever) he says..."ughh here we go again. " Now, he totally disregards my feelings and makes me feel like crap. He comes back with saying..."ooooh so I NEVER do ANYTHING." Well..really...if you think about it, he doesn't. I take care of him 24/7 and he helps when it's OKAY for him.

Explaining won't work and I don't think therapy will either. I don't know what to do. I'm trying to be a good wife and mother, but he thinks he is NEVER wrong. He doesn't understand what I go through as a mother....
What really realllllly urks me, is when I spend about 20 mintues explaining to him.....he says something like...."okay, so what are you REALLY mad about...?" "What is the deal?" I feel llike I'm talking to a child that just doesn't want to listen and accept that he isn't always right.

Oh and his job entails sitting in an Arms room handing out weapons. Yes, the hours suck....but he doesn't move around. -_-
Update: *Thanks Michie...

*I've tried ignoring the problem. He thinks things are all wonderful then...but deep down...I'm still hurting.
Update 2: *Myth girl..... lol You must be living in a fairy land. For one, as far as our sexual relationship goes...It couldnt be better. We flirt, we act as if we just got together. But as far as the...Let's be adults and take care of what we need to as parents....yeah not so well. 2....Working as an "Armor"... show more *Myth girl.....
lol You must be living in a fairy land. For one, as far as our sexual relationship goes...It couldnt be better. We flirt, we act as if we just got together. But as far as the...Let's be adults and take care of what we need to as parents....yeah not so well.
2....Working as an "Armor" yeah you don't hand out Arms? I don't know what you are talking about. But he is the Army and so was I. Working in the arms room is a CAKE *** job. You sit in there and watch movies and when someone needs a weapon to work their shift, you go get it and give them rounds....WHICH ARENT IN THE WEAPON...so there is no possibly way of "shooting someone". Get your facts straight. He has an easy *** job.
I have a job too. I am a photographer and I do photoshoots about 15 times a month. I do editing and a lot of tedious work. But still..It's my responsibility to take care of the child by myself? HA.....We both made our son, he can help raise him. Your hub must luv u 4 suckin his cock evry day.
Update 3: Libby...you gave some good points. But really...you would have to see it to understand it. I am the FIRST person to admit when I'm wrong. Always always! Im the first to apologize....I can't do it anymore when I am not in the wrong. When I approach him about needing help....I don't yell...I am not... show more Libby...you gave some good points. But really...you would have to see it to understand it. I am the FIRST person to admit when I'm wrong. Always always! Im the first to apologize....I can't do it anymore when I am not in the wrong. When I approach him about needing help....I don't yell...I am not negative...AT ALL. That is just how he is. I don't know how many times I praise him for things. For anything...thanks babe for picking up the mail....thanks for putting the dishes in the dishwasher....I dont care what it is. He admitted to me that he should have helped today....but only after the hour of fighting. That is how it is every time. He always sees the light....but only after fighting for an hour. See...I know I have been wrong...we fought about him not helping at night and he explained how tired he was. I understood, said I was sorry and now I take the baby at night no questions asked. I am whole heartedly not in the wrong this time.
Update 4: and if YOU would have read my post...you would see that I am FAR from selfish. I think you just don't like to hear that your answer was stupid and a waste of my time.
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