You can talk to the prosecutor. They may or may not wish to pursue the case anyway. They also may try to give you some of those life lessons that you are trying to avoid, and for good reason. It can be embarrassing for men to come forward in domestic violence cases, but it happens more often than you would think. On a misdemeanor, she would most likely get anger management or something like that. She may not be hurting you, but it's better that she work through her issues before she has children who are much more fragile.
If, after really listening to what the prosecutor says, you still disagree, you can talk to her lawyer. She may not be able to talk to you due to restraining orders (usually the case, but obviously I don't know about your situation), and so if you try to talk to her, she'll have to hang up or walk away or face further charges. Her lawyer also cannot contact you on her behalf, but ask the prosecutors if you can contact her lawyer. They will most likely say that you can, but they will advise against it.
I used to work in the DA's office in the Domestic Violence Bureau. Often a plea deal for counseling is the best outcome to misdemeanor domestic assault cases. Acquittals far too often come back later as felonies. It is VERY difficult for someone who hits once to not do it again without serious help. This time it was you, next time it may be your defenseless child.