? asked in HealthMen's Health · 9 years ago

WHY WOULD A 13 YEAR OLD CONSTANTLY FEEL THIS WAY?

Hi im a teen and i have absolutely no friends at school or even outside of school I feel like if i died no one would notice i'm gone . i barely go out and spend most of my time at home sometimes i feel really sad and angry about it and i just wish i could be like the other kids that have friends to talk to or someone to text or hang out with them , every time i feel sad i eat allot and i just listen to music . . I'm really shy and that prevent me from talking to others and make new friends. But then the only thing i consider a friend to me is my ipod i listen to music for 8 hours a day nonstop and it makes me feel happy. Their is some days when i want to make friends But then i just do not feel like having friends, when i'm around people i do not talk to them and i just isolate myself I get asked many times " why do you like being a loner" and at times i just do not what to answer again. How can i stop feeling this way>? and why do i feel this way?

( IM A 13 year old girl)

Thank u !!

16 Answers

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  • 9 years ago
    Best Answer

    Hi,

    I am a 15 year old boy and I know exactly how you feel. I have spent 3 years in "isolation" (well that was what I seen it as.) I had a couple of friends at school but zero friends that I could hang around with. I did go out until I was 12 but I was badly bullied by the people I thought were my friends. I spent those 3 years stuck inside. With he exception of going to school and going out with my parents to go to the shop or go in the car somewhere. I was pretty happy because my family life was strengthened and I learned a lot from reading books and watching T.V.

    When was bored I played the Playstation / X Box. This kept me occupied for hours - this is the same as your IPOD to you. Up until the start of the summer I was happy but then I thought. ' I need to get out - side and do things. Because I can't stay inside all summer.' When I was studying for my GCSE's I noticed that one of the friends who I used to hang around with was playing football in his backyard by himself. He was one of the true friends I had back then. I was also kind of shy but something just came over me, I got on my shoes and walked up the street to his house and called in for him. I asked him if he wanted to go for a walk. We reminisced about the old days and I asked him questions about school and sports and just talked about anything that came into my head. (I mostly asked him questions because I think that people like to talk about themselves.) After we finished the walk he asked me if he wanted to hang around together and I said "Yes". Now I have been out non stop and I am having a good time with the new gang.

    Maybe you might have a person in your class that you have the same interests as you - possibly music and talk to them about it. You could try to get over your shyness by practising what you would say before you say it to the person. That's what I did. :D

    If you cant think of anything to say just share your IPOD and both of you just listen to the music. I know it is hard to do these things and it is pretty scary but you have to overcome it. These young moments are the moments we will remember when we are older. The worst thing the person can say is "no". I think you should give it a shot because it worked for me.

    If this doesn't work you could also get a companion that is not human. I mean like getting a dog or a cat. For me I had a German Shepherd and a lizard.

    I hope this helped and good luck!

    Dean

    Source(s): Personal experience 3 years in "isolation"
  • 9 years ago

    MAKE SURE THAT YOU KNOW SOME THINGS.

    This is a stage lots of people go through. You might be depressed, have thoughts of killing yourself, but REMEMBER THIS: You have your whole life ahead of you, this stage of your life will pass and in the future you will think of it as nothing. Kids are cruel people, but find people you can relate to. You have an interest in music, find someone who isn't a total ***** and start a conversation about music. It just might click. A simple thing like music can bond people together forever. Don't let shyness get to you, just go up to someone you maybe have briefly talked to before, and just say "hi, i'm really shy and have trouble making friends. Could you help". If they have any sympathy they would help you out.

    Source(s): ngurs
  • 9 years ago

    Well...I kinda know how you feel...I'm all alone now...Nothing new...I've been alone all my life.My parents always moving,I had no friends,my parents too busy to spend time with me...I was all alone,at the end of my rope when...I discovered Yu-Gi-Oh(don't laugh)...That became my passion in my life,my source of confidence...I found something I was really good at...The powerful cards were the closest things to friends I ever had,but deep down,I knew they weren't real...So never mind...I then decided to be a pro duelist..But that day everything changed...I was on my way to the London Grand Prix Championships 2007,when I met these kids-Tai,Matt and Caleb on a ship to London..I spent quite some time with them,and then I realized I felt something I have never felt before-friendship.They live in New York,just like me,so since then they became my best friends...Sure,we would have to face each other off in a duel,but nothing will ever ruin the bond we share as friends...So,I wanted to say my life story...I know you will find friends,just believe in yourself!Be happy,and remember that you have people around you who love you and who will always love you!

    And good luck my friend!

    Source(s): :-)
  • 9 years ago

    well to make friends you have to believe it and kind of expose yourself..maybe at the beginning you find some people who take advantage of you or something. You have to be strong and I'm sure you'll find some guys that would be true friends and stay with you at all difficult moments. Don't be afraid to meet new people! When someone will ask you again this you will answer him you don't really like being alone and you would like to make new friends

    hope I helped you

    good luck

    ;)

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  • 9 years ago

    I was the same. I was very shy and barely had any friends. One day my friend (who wasn't my friend really at the time) said I was boring and not interesting because of my shyness. The next day I thought about it and went out and talked to people at school. I would just jump into the group and be more aggressive, verbally.

    That saying ''be yourself'' is not always true. Be different, be louder and more outgoing, that is what's interesting to kids at school.

  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    Suck it up. Use that time to work out and study until you can get farther; success attracts people. If not, tell the people who ask you about being a loner to f'ck off. Accomplish enough and you'll feel better than them. You won't need people.

  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    You should just get out and talk to your friends so that you won't be a loner anymore. You might get a boyfriend as well, but you're probably too young to have a serious one. Good luck.

  • 9 years ago

    i know what your going through.

    when i was a little kid i had bright bright red hair, to top it on top of that my parents named me Dietrich. it gets worse my mom is very frugal and dose not like to spend money on cloths that people like. So i was an outcast i walk the halls alone and ate lunch in the bathroom i hated my self i thought i did something wrong and that's why people hated me. but it really was not my fault i would get into fights every other week at school to let out my pent up anger on people. I would stay up at night crying begging god to just make me like other kids and have friends. Then i hit 8th grade grew to 6,3 and 200 lbs and the people that once made fun of me to my face now did it behind my back because i was huge and everyone was scared of me. i tryed everything i grew my hair out cut it short nothing helped nothing will help tell you realize that kids are cruel and mean and they have no feelings twords what other people are going through. what helped me is to find people like me and that will be your friends and understand you. i got on anti depressants because i tryed to kill my self that could be an option.

  • Anonymous
    9 years ago

    go see a child councilor and have a chat to them and see why you can't make friends

    as you will get better results talking to them than here . as for listening to music for a long

    time you will end up with tinnitus {ringing in the ear.} go talk to your mum as she will be able

    to steer you to the right path of friendship.

  • 9 years ago

    at 13 I enjoyed my bicycle and whatever toys I had around me.

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