Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsSingles & Dating · 1 decade ago

Should I start dating?

I am a 17 years old female; very independent and mature. I've never been in a relationship because I want to be with someone who I can spend the rest of my life with. I've had many pursuers, but I ended up rejecting them all. It seems to me that nowadays, people are in relationships for the wrong reasons and end up getting divorced, and I honestly don't want that. I have always been telling myself that I would be content to spend my life being single if I cannot find someone who I truly love. However, even when I encounter guys who seem to be very nice, mature, and are interested in me, I find myself pushing them away. My concerns are that maybe I'm still at a young age to be dating seriously, and most importantly, since I'm looking for a guy that I could see a future with, I don't want to lead somebody on by dating and end up breaking his heart. I'm afraid that perhaps I'm being too harsh and not giving anyone a chance, someone who could possibly be the one for me. So, my question is, should I start dating? and if not now, when is the appropriate age? Or should I just not date at all and just let whatever comes, come?

7 Answers

  • ?
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    First, I want to commend you on thinking this through. Too often people so young just jump right into dating and having sex without giving it much thought. So it's nice to see that there are still girls/women out there who think about dating people with substance and for a reason besides sex. Good on you!

    You shouldn't date if you don't want to. You also shouldn't date someone that you don't like. If the attraction isn't there, then it isn't there and don't take it personally. I do think 17 is rather young to be dating in hopes of finding that "forever" guy. Not to say that some teenagers didn't find "the one" at that age, but that type of love is rare and hard to find. I think a good age to start dating is 18 or 19 just to see what's out there. Then you'll get an idea of the type of men you like or don't like, and what to avoid and also what to look for in the future. Don't feel like you have to date. Eventually you'll want to - it's just your choice of waiting for that day to come and hit you or if you want to just throw yourself out there right now. There's no rush - it all depends on when it feels right for you.

  • Greg N
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    Dating isn't only for those who want casual or throwaway relationships. It's also not full of drama if you don't want it to be.

    Your chances of meeting someone and knowing you want to spend your rest of your life with them from an early stage of the relationship, then have your desire remain consistent over the course of the relationship, is very slim unless you date first. You need to accept dating in at least some capacity.

    Failed relationships early on also serve a very important purpose--they help you better understand what you need most. Or what type of person fits you best. You may think you know now, but trust me, you probably don't, or at least you could use clarification. We all know what we dream about, and what we think works best, but you don't truly understand that until it's been put to the test.

    You should learn things now before you get married to someone, before it REALLY counts, you know?

    And 17 is more than an appropriate age to start dating.

  • 1 decade ago

    Wait until you find him.

    There really isn't a distinguished time to 'start dating'.

    You should only consider dating when you find somebody who is absolutely amazing.

    You seem mature enough to wait for whoever that person is.

    It's great that you're actually waiting for somebody who you can actually love; a lot of people seem to take whatever comes their way these days.

    Don't acquire the ice queen mindset with guys though, the worst predicament you can put yourself in is the one where you 'push' those who *could* be decent away.

    First impressions are severely discombobulating.

    Source(s): Another independant and mature teenager, who waited and found somebody she could trust and truly love.
  • Ange
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    the only way to know if you want to spend a future with a guy is to get to know him first! if you find someone you like don't push him away..just let things run their course...there is no "appropriate age" for dating. If you find a guy you want to get to know better then go the same time don't drop your standards and just take whatever comes your way. but you should also keep in mind that if you're dating a guy it doesn't necessarily mean you're going to marry're just getting to know him first to see if it's worth it...also don't over think everything...i'm 17 and i'm not even thinking about marriage...what is to be will be :)

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    The future does not exist. It is a figment of your imagination. Forget it and live in the now, and if by luck you find a guy, be happy. The universe will look after the next 60 years.


    If I had the inclination, I could write you a book about all the curve balls that life pitched, just in our family. Ignoring those in friends, colleagues and acquaintances.

  • 4 years ago

    sixteen is a competent age to bypass on dates with human beings you prefer to get to be attentive to greater advantageous. 17-college is probably whilst i'd date heavily. Dates do not continuously must be a extreme dedication. you could merely bypass on dates with distinctive human beings just to fulfill new human beings and get to be attentive to them greater advantageous. (do exactly not lead them on, cuz thats some thing completely distinctive)

  • 1 decade ago

    We think alike. This is my same situation but i am 15. i always set the standards really high i think for young women like yourself and i we need to wait or find older young men.

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